


StoryTime

by xhookswenchx (ReluctantPrincess)



Category: Once Upon a Time (TV)
Genre: AU, F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-01-01
Updated: 2017-01-01
Packaged: 2018-09-13 21:57:07
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 10
Words: 22,807
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9143767
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ReluctantPrincess/pseuds/xhookswenchx
Summary: After getting out of prison, Emma Nolan returns home, and tries to piece her life back together. Dealing with a betrayal that led to the false charges and imprisonment, a divorce, and getting to know her toddler son again, she doesn't have time for the blue eyed charmer who helps run the StoryTime program at the local library.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Hey guys! I'm back with a new tale! I wrote a little ficlet a few months ago, and decided it was time to expand it.

 

_ Emma Nolan dropped her bags the instant she saw her family waiting for her. It had been a long, and trying six months, and all she wanted to do was go home and lick her wounds. Her brother and sister-in-law looked as if they wanted to rush up and hug her, but instead, they let loose the one thing Emma missed the most. _

_ Henry. _

_ “Mama!” the little boy rushed to her. As she scooped him into her arms, she noticed David and Mary Margaret going to grab her bags. Henry continued chanting, “Mama! Mama!” as she hugged him and sobbed.  _

_ She couldn’t believe he remembered her. After all, he was barely two, and when her brother had taken him in, the kid was hardly talking at all.  _

“Emma?” 

Emma snapped back to the present, and realized her brother was giving her a funny look. “Sorry,” she muttered, “guess I spaced out.”

She’d been home just about a month, and still felt like she was adjusting. David and Mary Margaret had been kind enough to take her in after everything that had happened. Not that any of it was really her fault, but…

“It’s over,” Mary Margaret reminded her, “and you’re home. Forget about Neal, forget about jail, and forget about-”

“Only getting short phone calls to my son, who couldn’t even visit me while I was rotting in a cell?” Sure, her name had been cleared when investigators finally realized she’d been framed, but she still blamed herself for missing out on six months of her son’s life. Now she was sitting at the kitchen table, proof of her divorce being final in her hands, and all she could think about was how she missed out on the only thing that kept her going.

“We did the best we could,” Mary Margaret reminded her, “but Phoenix is a long way from Storybrooke.”

“I’m sorry,” Emma said, “I’m not angry with you. I know it was better for him to stay here, and stay stable… I just… if I’d just left when you told me to...none of this would have happened.”

“And then you wouldn’t have that beautiful little boy over there,” Mary Margaret nodded over at Henry, who was passed out on the couch, fully exhausted from their earlier trip to the park.

“Things are going to be okay,” David assured her. Honestly, she hated having to rely on them when she was the one who screwed her own life up. But she was also incredibly grateful. Grateful to have family who would take her son in, and grateful that they wouldn’t turn their backs on her. “You’ve got a steady job, a good support system, and you’ll be back on your feet in no time.”

Emma never thought she’d return to Storybrooke. When she ran off with Neal five years ago, most of her friends were going to college. She had gotten pregnant. Or...she  _ thought  _ she had gotten pregnant. By the time she realized it was a false alarm, she and Neal were halfway to Arizona. They finished the trip, and got married anyway. What else were couples who were young and in love supposed to do?

Neal wasn’t a bad guy. In fact, he was a pretty decent husband. It was his knack for getting into trouble that sealed the fate on their marriage. As far as criminals went, he was small time, and actually pretty good at hiding it from Emma, who had done all she could to get a respectable job in an attempt to build a home and a future. 

Unfortunately, he’d gotten in over his head, and before she knew it, the blame was being placed on her. She never figured out if Neal was part of the frame job, or if his cohorts just took it upon themselves, but one day, she was living completely unaware, and the next, she was behind bars.

She wanted to give up, but she knew it wasn’t an option. In addition to taking in her son, David and Mary Margaret helped her find representation. (For both her legal troubles  _ and  _ her divorce.)  For six long months, she felt hopeless. It wasn’t until her lawyer came in, proclaiming good news. The mess had been cleared up, the real criminals had been caught, and she was free to go. Her lawyer suggested fighting for compensation for the six months she’d spent behind bars, but Emma had been away from her son long enough. She was ready to go home.

* * *

 

Home hadn’t changed all that much in the five years she’d been gone. A lot of her old friends had stuck around, or come back after college. Some had started families, others had taken over businesses. Emma found it incredibly ironic that she had taken up a job as the night time dispatcher at the Sheriff’s station. But, when your brother was a deputy, you worked wherever he could put in a good word for you.

Her best friend, Elsa, and Elsa’s sister, Anna, had also come back from school. Emma hadn’t seen much of Elsa yet, due to her friend being incredibly busy with a new baby, but Anna, who was a year younger than them, had taken the assistant librarian position at the public library. When Emma came back into town, she learned quickly that Henry had a little crush on the red-head, and demanded (in babble terms) that they be at every Storytime on Saturdays morning. 

It wasn’t a bad gig. Emma would get off work, pick up Henry, and they’d head on down. Anna, who had a little boy just a bit younger than Henry, was great with the kids, and seemed to love Storytime just as much as her pint sized audience.

Emma had the routine down in no time. Leave work, get Henry, listen to stories, then go home and crash. It was simple enough, and sometimes, he even took a nap too. 

This Saturday was no different from the past few since she'd been home. She grabbed Henry, and headed straight to the library. She pushed through the doors, realizing she was just a little bit early. That wasn't a bad thing, it gave her time to catch up with Anna before the other moms started arriving.

Taking a quick look around, she noticed Anna was nowhere to be found. Belle was behind the counter, talking to another patron. She gave Emma a quick smile and a wave, which Emma returned, but bothering her to ask about Anna was out of the question. With a sigh, Emma headed towards the children's section. 

She set Henry down, and cringed when the first thing he did, was run to a dark haired man looking through the shelves. 

“Hey, lad,” the man turned to talk to her son, who now had a death grip on his leg. 

Oh god, this was going to be embarrassing.

Emma started to rush towards the pair, just as the man reached down to pick him up. All bets were off now. “Hey!” She shouted, “get away from my kid!” She knew she was making a scene, but she truly didn't care. If this guy was up to no good-

“Apologies,” he turned to her as best he could, despite Henry's death grip on his leg, “I...who are you?”

Really? He was the jerk picking up  _ her _ kid, and he had the nerve to question her identity? Emma grabbed Henry, who protested at having to let go of the mans leg. As she got a better look, she realized he already had a kid in one arm. Anna's son, Jack. “Who are you?” She shot back, “and if you think you're going anywhere with my friend’s son-”

Then the idiot started laughing. What was so funny about him getting caught? “Perhaps we should start over,” he said, “since you aren't Mary Margaret, I can only assume you're Emma Nolan, the boy’s mother?” When Emma nodded, he extended his hand, “name’s Killian Jones, and I'm the uncle.”

“Oh.” Now she wanted to die. Of course Henry ran up to him. He knew him. And Jack was obviously not in any danger. Embarrassed, she quickly shook his hand, and tried not to think about the growing crowd that came to see the commotion. “I'm just gonna sit down and wait for Anna.” She went to the table and sat down, cringing when he sat next to her. 

“Anna isn't coming,” he said, his damn accent making her stomach do flip flops. (There was no way in hell she was going to risk looking at him again.) “She fell ill, and asked me to fill in for her.”

“Okay.” She winced at her poor choice of words, and how silly she probably sounded. Really though, the last thing she wanted was attention, and right now, her audience didn't seem too interested in going away. “I'm sorry…” she whispered, desperately trying to keep the tears at bay,  “can we just forget this ever happened?” 

“Think nothing of it,” he said.

She let out a sigh of relief when she noticed their non-confrontation was beginning to bore the other patrons. Finally, the lump in her throat disappeared, and the urge to cry followed. Silence settled between them, but for some reason, Killian didn't leave the seat next to her. It wasn't until moms and kids started filing in, that he spoke to her again.

“Emma?” 

After taking a deep breath, she found the courage to speak again, “yes?”

“Could you do me a favor?” He waited for her to nod before continuing. “Usually, Belle sits with Jack when she isn't busy, but today it's just a little more crowded than usual…”

“Sure,” she said.

“Sure?”

She looked over at him, “you need help with Jack,” she said, “this isn't my first rodeo.” She'd sat with the little boy plenty of times while Anna worked. He was never any trouble, and Henry seemed to like having a friend.

“You're a lifesaver,” he was grinning from ear to ear, and Emma wanted to kick herself for daring to face him again. She could easily get lost in those too blue eyes, and- “everything alright?” He asked, bringing her back to earth. 

“Yeah,” she set Henry down, and watched as he set Jack beside her son. “He'll be fine.” It was an attempt to assure him that she wasn't a complete idiot. He nodded, and thanked her again before heading to the front of the group so he could get started. 

Emma knew she was staring...all the moms were. But Killian didn't seem to really pay much attention to the adults. Instead, he was thoroughly engrossed in telling a tale to the children. Once in awhile though, he'd look over at her and give her a wink that made her cheeks feel hot. (She also earned a few glares from the other mothers because of this.)

She was impressed that he'd managed to keep a room full of toddlers from getting bored and fidgety for a half an hour. Even Anna had trouble once she'd hit that fifteen minute mark. 

The second half hour was always some sort of activity that allowed the kids to get messy, and have fun. Emma liked the activities, as they really helped wear Henry out, and by this time, she was really ready for a nap. Just like Anna, Killian didn't disappoint. He rolled out the tarp, and brought out the paints, and before she knew it, about ten kids were making messes of their papers. She figured he wouldn't join them, so she was a bit shocked when he sat down and started playing with Henry and Jack. She joined in the fun, and helped Henry paint what looked like a jumbled mess of colors. 

“Ian!” Henry patted Killian's face in an attempt to get his attention. 

“Oh god,” Emma Sighed, and pulled her son away before he could make things worse. “I'm sorry-”

“It's just a bit of finger paint,” Killian chuckled, seemingly unphased by the little blue handprint on his face. “Bit of soap and water, and it'll come right off. No harm done.”

It baffled her at how patient he was with all the kids. Even she had trouble keeping her cool sometimes, and that was just with Henry. (He was just getting into his temper tantrum phase, and it had her wondering what sort of misdeeds she'd done in the past to deserve that sort of torture.)

By the time Storytime was wrapping up, Killian, Emma, Henry, and Jack had even more paint all over them. His jeans had little handprints, and her hair had green spots. Henry and Jack each had little red noses, and the papers they'd been given as a canvas had long been forgotten. It was the first time since she'd been back in town that she hadn't gotten lost in her own little world of self doubt. 

“I can handle a little cleanup, love,” Killian said, once everyone had gone. 

“I usually help Anna out,” Emma said, picking up the paints, and putting them in a box. She looked at Killian, and frowned, “but it looks like I might owe you some new jeans…” 

“I'll let you in on a secret,” he whispered, “these are my brother’s jeans.”

She giggled as they cleaned together, and once the tarp was folded and everything put away, she picked up Henry. “I guess I'll see you next time Anna calls out?” She asked. 

Killian smiled, and picked up Jack, “or…” he said, almost shyly, “perhaps we could go grab a coffee now?”

Dammit. 

“I…” she sighed. He was a nice guy, and it was obvious the fact that she was toting a two year old didn't bother him, but she couldn't get mixed up with anyone. Even if his offer was friendly, she could already see it going elsewhere. “I just got off work,” she said. She didn't want to be rude, or hurt him, but she couldn't say yes. 

“Night shift?”

“Yeah,” she nodded, “I really just need to get some sleep.”

“Perhaps another time, then,” he suggested. There was a look of defeat on his face, as if he knew she was blowing him off. 

“Yeah,” she smiled, and he smiled back, but she could tell that he knew her answer was non-committal. She had no intention of pursuing anything with this guy.

“See you around, Nolan.”


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Emma meets up with her friends for a barbeque only to discover that Killian is coming too. Jealousy, doubt, and perhaps a new friendship begin to build as the two spend a little time together.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Always a huge thank you to @ilovemesomekillianjones for being my beta!

“I’m so glad you could make it!” Anna exclaimed as Emma brought Henry into the backyard. Mary Margaret and David were close behind, and once they caught up, it was an attack of hugs.

It wasn’t that Emma didn’t like hugs, she just didn’t care too much for all the attention. In fact, she would have avoided the barbecue altogether, just as she had declined every invite since she’d been back, but Mary Margaret gave her a gentle reminder that avoiding friends probably wasn’t her best idea.

Still, Emma was a bit uncomfortable. Only Mary Margaret and David knew all the details of Arizona, but everyone else saw the results. Henry had been without his mother for six months, and everyone who knew it was gathered up in one spot. It wasn’t that she expected her friends to judge her, no, they’d all been wonderful and welcoming upon her return. It was the potential questions that scared her. Anna had asked once about her time in Arizona, and Emma was able to brush it off, but now? Now everyone was here, and everyone was curious. Elsa had sent her a text the night prior, saying she couldn’t wait to catch up.

Emma just didn’t want to find out what her friends thought of her misadventures in marriage and motherhood.

The whole ordeal wasn’t her fault. Her brother and sister-in-law constantly reminded her of that. But she couldn’t help feeling guilty. Every time she looked at the photos and videos of all the milestones she’d missed, she became angry that others had the chance to celebrate every victory, weather every trial, and sooth every hurt. 

“Emma?” 

Emma looked up, and saw Elsa. She had just come in the gate, and had a huge grin on her face. Emma didn’t waste any time rushing over to the friend that she hadn’t seen in so long. Suddenly, all the worries washed away as she started chattering with Elsa. 

“Emma!” 

Emma looked over Elsa's shoulder, and saw Killian coming into the yard, a tiny bundle, who she assumed was Elsa's little girl, resting on his shoulder. “You didn't tell me he would be here,” she groaned quietly. She acknowledged him, but didn't particularly want to talk to him. It had been a week since she'd seen him last, and she wasn't quite ready for that confrontation.

Elsa laughed, “What's wrong with Killian?”

“Nothing,” she muttered. It wasn't that she disliked him. She could tell he was a good guy, and everything, and maybe that was part of the problem. It wouldn't take much for her to find herself in over her head with him. Then there was the fact that she'd made a complete idiot out of herself. And while she was at it, she couldn't forget the broken hearted look on his face when she turned down his coffee date.

But, Killian didn't seem to pick up on subtle cues as he continued towards them. “Hi, Emma,” he said, all but ignoring Elsa. Emma mumbled a “hello,” and looked to her friend for assistance.

“First you steal my child, and then, you can't even give me a hug?” Elsa feigned offense. 

“It just so happens,” Killian rolled his eyes, and handed the infant over, “that I'm helping. You wouldn't want her wasting away in the car, would you?”

“Liam said he had her,” Elsa said.

“Your useless husband can't figure out the damned playpen,” Killian snorted, “so, now I'm off to rescue him.” He glanced back at Emma, “good to see you again, love.” Before she could scold him for calling her “love,” he was already running back towards the car. 

“What did he do?” Elsa asked.

“Nothing,” Emma muttered. He'd been the perfect gentleman. Of course, Mary Margaret and David had told her about him, because he'd watched Henry on several occasions, but Emma never expected him to take a liking to her. 

But aside from stories, and their brief meeting, she didn't know much about him at all. Would he continue to pursue her? The thought made her a little uncomfortable. She knew he was just as unaware as everyone else about her prison time, but how much had her friends told him about her? 

Well, if he liked her, they obviously hadn't told him enough. 

“He's a nice guy,” Elsa said.

“I'm aware.” 

“Then what is it?”

“He likes her,” Anna chimed in. “Sorry to interrupt,” she apologized as she handed over an extremely wiggly Henry, “but this guy woke up, and was asking for you.”

Emma reached out for her son. “Hey there-”

“Ian!” Henry suddenly squealed. His attention left Emma completely, as he squirmed out of Anna's arms, and ran towards the two men coming in the gate. She flinched when Killian set down what he was carrying and lifted  _ her _ son into his arms. 

“Hello there, young man!” Killian seemed just as enthusiastic as Henry. 

“Emma, they're buddies,” Anna tried to explain. 

“He's  _ my _ son,” she said, through gritted teeth. She hated the jealousy that was bubbling up inside her, but her own son rejected her in favor of some guy she barely knew. 

“All the kids love him,” Elsa tried to explain, “he's a big hit at parties. I wouldn't read too much into it. Jack will be doing the same thing as soon as he wakes up.”

“It's true,” Anna shrugged. “Jack tends to forget I exist whenever Killian is around.”

“And you're okay with that?” Emma asked.

“It gives me and Kristoff a little break now and then,” she said.

She hated it. Hated the jealousy, the insecurities, and the fact that her son preferred some guy over her. But why wouldn't he? She'd only just come back into his life, and this guy seemed to be a stable fixture.

“I'm sorry.” 

Emma startled, realizing she'd spaced out, and now Killian was in front of her, trying to hand Henry over. “Oh-” Her son went straight to her, and laid his head on her shoulder. He didn't whine, or try to wiggle out of her arms, and she began to think she may have been overreacting.

“I didn't mean to intrude,” he continued, “I just…”

“Just what?” She was vaguely aware that everyone else was backing away, and giving them space. Part of her was grateful, and the other part was freaking out. What if he asked her out again?

“I missed him,” he said, his voice barely above a whisper. “Your brother told me you were coming back, so I figured, after being apart for so long, you'd want your space...” 

“Thank you…” she had no idea what else to say. Now she understood why he and Henry both seemed so excited to see each other. They weren't used to being apart for so long. Her heart sped up when she realized that this guy genuinely liked spending time with her kid. As if Henry was no different from his actual niece and nephew, and was just part of Killian’s family. “You can see him whenever you want, you know. I mean...I'm still living with David and Mary Margaret.” The way his face lit up, made her feel even worse for how she'd acted at the library a week prior. “I'm sorry,” she apologized.

“For what?”

“For being rude,” she explained.

“When were you rude?” 

He seemed genuinely confused, but that didn’t mean she could just brush it under the rug.

“You asked me to go for coffee last week, and I said no-”

“I'm going to stop you right there, Emma,” he interrupted, “it is your god given right to say no, and you should never feel like you need to apologize for it.”

“You like me.” She felt stupid saying it, the dumb statement tumbling out as if she knew exactly what his intentions were.

“I'm intrigued by you,” he nodded, “and...we run in the same circles, so I'd like to get to know you. I'd be lying if I said I wasn't interested, but I'm not going to hound you.”

“The ink on my divorce papers isn't even dry,” she admitted. What was it about this guy that had her confessing to things he didn't need to know? 

Killian nodded, as if that one statement had informed him of every single fear that was echoing around her head. “Seeing as you don't mind me coming around to see Henry, would it be safe to say you wouldn't mind being at least friendly acquaintances?” When Emma hesitated, he reiterated, “Friends.”

But it was never that easy, was it? She could already see herself falling far too hard for Killian Jones, and all their friends would probably encourage, rather than discourage the idea.

“I think I can manage that.” She smiled. The jealousy died down, but she still wasn't quite sure what to make of Killian.

“Ian!” 

Emma turned around, and just as Anna said he would, Jack was barreling towards Killian at breakneck speed. 

“I guess talk time is over,” he chuckled, and lifted Jack up. “Is it time to play now, lad?” He laughed harder when Jack shrieked out a “yeah!”

Henry perked up, and Emma quickly squashed the jealousy that threatened to return. “If you wanted...maybe Henry could play too?”

There was that award winning smile again. “Really?”

“Yeah,” she nodded. Henry seemed on board with the plan too.

“There isn't a monopoly on playtime. Perhaps you'd like to join us?”

She could feel everyone's eyes on her as she followed him to the little playhouse Anna and Kristoff had set up for Jack. Knowing her friends, they were already starting to plot, even though the last thing she needed was a matchmaking service. 

Killian seemed to understand her need for space, and was true to his word. All they did, was play with the boys. There were no requests for coffee dates, or flirty pick up lines. (Though, Killian didn’t seem the type to rely on cheesey pickup lines.)

The longer they played though, the more curious Emma was. She could easily see why the kids liked him. He was fun, and didn’t balk at the idea of running around and acting silly. But it was more than that. He wasn’t just an overgrown man-child who refused to grow up, he had a unique bond with the kids in his life. No wonder they flocked to him.

She wanted to ask so many questions. Who was he, really? Where did he come from? What did he do for a living? 

“All right there, Emma?” he asked, his cheeks flushed from chasing the boys around the play area. He had a big smile on his face, and that was when she noticed he had Henry by his feet, hanging him upside down. She tickled Henry’s tummy, causing her son to burst into a fit of giggles. “You spaced out for a minute, and I caught this one running in for the tackle.” He pulled Henry back upright, and set him down, laughing when the little boy ran off to tackle Jack instead.

“I’m fine,” she said, “just a little out of it, I guess.” She looked over at the boys, who were now in full on wrestling mode. They were both laughing, so she figured letting them tumble around a little bit longer wasn’t going to hurt anyone. “They play rough.”

“They do,” he agreed, “and they’re laughing now, but give them about ten more seconds, and one of them will be crying.”

Right on cue, both boys started wailing after accidentally knocking heads.

“Dammit,” Emma muttered as she rushed over to her son. Killian was right behind her, and Anna was coming towards them. Between the three of them, they managed to untangle the boys. A few hugs, kisses, and a couple of ice packs later, and all was forgotten. 

Mostly.

“You don’t think they have concussions, do you?” Emma whispered to Killian once everyone had settled down to eat lunch. She looked over at Henry and Jack, who sat at the smaller, more colorful toddler picnic table, and chattered nonsense as they ate their own lunches. 

“They’re fine,” he said, “it wasn’t even that hard of a knock.” When she brought her attention back to Killian, she gave him a look, hoping he understood that she was not convinced. “You can always take him to the doctor if it would make you feel better.”

“How do you know?” Before she went to jail, Henry was still getting the hang of walking, and now, he was a terror on two legs. She was his mother. Wasn’t maternal instinct supposed to help her keep him from getting injured? Wasn’t she supposed to know whether or not he needed medical attention after she failed to protect him? “God, I’m a terrible parent.” She muttered quietly as she stuffed a piece of potato in her mouth.

Apparently, Killian heard the last part, and wasn’t going to let her go down the rabbit hole. “You’re a good mother,” he said, “children play, and they get hurt, and it’s no one’s fault, really. It just happens. You can see that he’s fine just by looking at him. There’s no bumps, and hardly a bruise. He’s acting normal, and as of right now, he’s long since forgotten all about it. Just keep an eye on him, and if you notice anything out of the ordinary, you can take him in.”

“Hey,” David interrupted. They’d been fairly quiet, but she was pretty sure it was hard not to notice her suddenly sulky mood. “Are you okay?”

Emma nodded, and did her best to give him a convincing smile. She appreciated everyone trying to look out for her, and the fact that Killian, someone who barely knew her was taking the time to try and make her feel better, but she didn’t much feel like she deserved it. 

He meant well, but the fact was, he didn't know her, and was basing his opinion off of two brief meetings. He didn't have to witness the everyday struggle that had her questioning whether or not she should even be  _ allowed _ to be a parent. 

Everything felt so out of sorts since her return. She was still a complete stranger to her own son, and even though she was beginning to understand her toddler, she was still discovering she hardly knew him at all.

What kind of mother didn't know her own child?


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Emma and Killian do a little bonding at the library. 
> 
> Thank you, of course, to @ilovemesomekillianjones for helping me with beta duties!

It had been a rough morning for both of them. Emma was beyond exhausted, her shift being unusually active for such a sleepy town. Henry seemed to be fairly cranky, and after Mary Margaret explained that he hadn’t slept well, Emma could understand why. Still, he insisted on going to the library, and then threw an all out fit when Anna wasn’t there to greet them. Jack also seemed to be absent, which didn't help. 

“Emma,” Killian seemed out of breath as he rushed out of the office, and into the lobby, “you're here.”

“Why wouldn't I be?” she asked. Henry was continuing to wail in her arms, and her patience was wearing thin. 

“Jack was sick this morning,” he explained, “and Belle won't be able to make it until later. With no one to watch the library, we had to cancel. Anna told me she sent you a message.”

“She probably did,” Emma groaned, “it hasn't been the easiest morning though.” 

“I can see that,” he smirked at Henry, who's meltdown was only getting worse. “Did someone miss their nap?” 

Emma just wanted to cry. Currently, she was thanking her lucky stars that there weren't any other patrons. “Both of us,” she grumbled. “I'm sorry,” she frowned, “I guess I'm just a little cranky too.”

“Nonsense,” he said. There was a slight pause, and then, he pointed to Henry, “May I?” She nodded, and handed Henry over. Her son didn't seem to like the idea at all, but Killian just tucked the boy under his arm, like a little football, as he continued to throw a fit. He grinned when she giggled, and nodded towards the office. “Anna has a playpen in there,” he said, “and I've got coffee.”

Coffee sounded amazing, and the brief break from a screaming toddler was a relief. There was a little pang of guilt for losing her patience, but it died quickly, and was replaced by the amusement of watching Killian struggle with the defiant child. 

In the office, Killian placed Henry in the playpen, which royally pissed off her already pissed off son. “Just leave him be for a moment,” Killian said when she tried to retrieve Henry. He pulled out a chair for her, and poured her a cup of coffee. “There's cream and sugar if you'd like,” he gestured towards the basket on the desk in front of her, “and if you give me just a minute, I know Anna has some juice in her fridge. Is he allergic to anything?”

“No,” Emma shook her head. She watched as Killian found some apple juice in the mini-fridge. He filled a sippy cup, and handed it to Henry, who, at first, threw it down. “He's just inconsolable,”she whined. She hated that she was so frustrated when Henry just couldn't help himself. He was tired, cranky, and dealing with a changed routine. It was the end of the world as far as he was concerned. 

“He'll be fine.” Killian did a quick check through the window to make sure the library was still empty. “Let me know if someone comes in?” Emma nodded, and tried not to laugh when he sat down on the floor in front of the playpen. She couldn't hear what exactly Killian was saying when he started trying to console the boy, but miraculously, it seemed to work. Henry began to calm down. 

After a few minutes, he picked up the sippy cup, (thank god for spill proof!) and laid down. Almost instantly, his eyes began to close, and before she knew it, he'd gone to sleep. 

“How...what did you say to him?” Emma asked in disbelief. 

“Nothing really,” Killian shrugged, “he was overly tired, and just needed to calm down long enough to let sleep take over.” 

“Thank you.” The jealousy was there, along with the frustration that she needed help taming her grumpy child. But she tried not to let it show, because above all, she was grateful that Henry had finally stopped screaming. 

“No trouble,” he said. With a little struggle, he stood, and gave her a smile. “Why don't you two relax while I try and get things in order around here?” 

“Or I could help you while he sleeps,” she suggested. He smiled at that, and she quickly downed her coffee, then followed him into the library. 

They worked side by side, mostly in silence as they straightened up, and reshelved books. It wasn't uncomfortable, but Emma wanted to talk to him while she had a chance. With the library being unusually empty, she figured it was the best time to speak up. No audience was the best audience. 

“I was going to ask if you wanted to go for coffee,” she said, then cringed. Who the hell started a conversation like that? “Umm...I mean… I was going to ask after  Storytime ...which didn't exactly happen, and then you already gave me coffee-”

“If the offer’s still on the table,” he interrupted, and she couldn't have been more grateful, “I'd enjoy a cup of something that isn't the terrible stuff they keep in that office.”

Her cheeks felt hot, so she was pretty sure she was blushing. “Ummm…” she stammered, and desperately tried to find her voice. Why was she so nervous? “Yeah,” she finally managed, “still on the table. Storybrooke Coffee isn't far, and they've got good breakfast options too...if you were hungry or...something.” She sighed, “please say something so I can stop rambling like an idiot.”

“Storybrooke Coffee just happens to be my favorite,” he said, “Belle should be here in about an hour, and Henry will likely be awake, and much happier by then.”

They continued to work until Henry woke up. Just as Killian predicted, her son was in a much better mood. She spent time playing with him while Killian continued to run the library, until Belle showed up, right on time. 

Once Killian and Belle changed guard, he and Emma made their way down the street to the coffee shop. 

After they ordered, and sat down to wait, Emma suddenly found herself nervous. She realized she really had no reason to be. Wasn’t this just two friends grabbing coffee? Besides, they had Henry with them, completely ruling out the scary “date” idea. They were friends, hanging out, and… oh god, why was she obsessing?

“Coffee?” Killian chuckled when he set her drink in front of her. 

“I’m spacey, I’m sorry,” she groaned.

“You’re exhausted,” he reminded her. 

She hummed in response as she took a sip of her coffee. Henry seemed irritated that she made him wait for his hot chocolate to cool down a little bit, and Killian laughed at her son's’ utter determination to disobey her. “He just wants to try my patience today,” she sighed.

“It’s his job,” Killian shrugged. “I see it takes it very seriously.” 

Emma rolled her eyes, and smiled. “Thanks.” Killian shrugged, and gave her a smirk. She finally deemed the hot chocolate cool enough for Henry, and turned her attention back to Killian. “I’m not good at socializing,” she admitted. “So...I guess getting to know you better isn’t a bad thing, but I have no idea where to start.”

“Well,” he leaned in closer, “what do you want to know?”

David and Mary Margaret had talked about Killian. They wanted her to know that she could trust the guy that they’d asked to babysit on occasion. But at the time, Killian hadn’t been working. From what she remembered, he had moved in with his brother and was looking for work. She knew he volunteered at the library, but the fact that he wasn’t always there made her think that maybe he’d found a job somewhere along the line. 

“I know you don’t work at the library,” she said, “so… what’s the story there?” 

“Anna’s my best friend,” he explained. “It’s quite a long story, so I’ll sum up. I met her in college right around the time she was trying to break up with her arse of an ex. We bonded over breakups. Then my brother and her sister hit it off, and my brother introduced her to his buddy, Kristoff, and bloody hell, Emma, it sounds like I’m trying to explain some twisted family tree.” They both laughed at the crazy twists and turns as he described the family the five of them found in each other. “After she graduated, she said she was coming home, and that she and her friend, Belle, were taking over the library, I told them I’d help them out. I didn’t have a job at the time, so moving wasn’t a big deal, and here I am.”

“I’m assuming you have a job now?” Emma asked. “Oh crap, that was rude. I didn’t mean it like that. I just mean...you’re not at the library all that much.”

“I help when I can,” he nodded, “mostly during weekends. During the week, I’m usually up in Portland.” He hesitated, then told her, “social services.”

Panic started to build up. It was unreasonable, but she couldn’t help it. “Are you...am I…”

“No!” he said quickly. “Emma, no. That’s the last thing I wanted you to think. Look, I don’t know what happened, and I get that you’re still unsure of things after being gone for so long, but my being here has nothing to do with you coming back into Henry’s life. It doesn’t work that way.”

“Mary Margaret said CPS did some crazy extensive check on them, and even hung around for awhile after they took him in,” she said.

“It was only for his protection,” he stated. 

“I know.”

“Emma, if you were being investigated for any reason, you would know, and I wouldn’t be the one doing anything. It’s a conflict of interest. Not to mention, no one is going to conduct some under the table, sneaky investigation under the ruse of friendship.” He smiled at her, and she relaxed a little bit.

“I’m sorry,” she shook her head, “I’m being irrational.”

“Thhppppppppppt.”

“Really?” Emma groaned at the sudden spray of hot chocolate, but she couldn't help but laugh at Henry's giggles. “I swear he didn't learn that from me,” she said, as she began to clean up the mess. She was thankful for the interruption though, however messy it was.

Killian began to help her with the mess, “Apologies,” he said, his cheeks turning red, “I'm almost certain he learned it from me. But I never used hot chocolate. I suppose it's his way of letting us know we aren't giving him enough attention?”

_ My son, the attention hog _ , she thought with a snicker. “I know there's a story in there.” She looked up at him, and her stomach fluttered at the sight of the mischievous smirk on his face. 

“Dave started it,” was all he offered as explanation.

“I think it’s time to head on home,” she said, “we’ve had enough excitement for one exhausting morning.”

Killian agreed, and offered to walk her home. The loft she was sharing with David and Mary Margaret was right around the corner, and she could have made it just fine on her own, but she wasn’t quite ready to leave Killian’s company.

She was greeted by a note from her friend on the door. “Seems Mary Margaret had some errands,” Killian said.

“I guess so,” she shrugged, opening the door. She tried not to let her irritation show, because, while she appreciated the fact that Mary Margaret would watch Henry so Emma could get some rest, she knew it wasn’t her friend’s job. So if Mary Margaret had errands, Emma could only hope the coffee would work its magic. She set Henry down, and watched him run towards the box where they kept all his toys. It was going to be a long afternoon.

“If you need sleep, I can watch him,” Killian offered. When she turned to look at him, bewildered that he seemed to read her mind, he laughed, “I can tell you’re exhausted. Up all night, and then pulling a quick shift at the library? No amount of coffee will get you through that.”

“I’m sure Mary Margaret will be home soon,” she said. 

Killian shooed her away, insisting he was fine. Knowing that there was no point in protesting, she made her way upstairs. Due to the openness of the loft, Emma could hear the boys giggling downstairs as they dug into Henry’s toys. It didn't take her long to drift off though, as exhaustion set in as soon as her head hit the pillow.

 


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Emma confides in Killian, and the two grow even closer.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As always, thank you to @ilovemesomekillianjones for helping beta!
> 
> Two things: 
> 
> 1) I am SO glad to finally have the opportunity to introduce Robin in this fic! Just a quick cameo at the end, but he, Roland, and Regina have a place as the story progresses. 
> 
> 2) Next week, there will likely not be a new chapter. This is because all my concentration has been towards January Joy this week. So you'll be getting a shiny new one shot, just not with this particular tale. It will pick up again on the following week.
> 
> Thank you for reading! I'm trying to respond to everyone, but sometimes, I overlook something. (i.e. Thought I replied, but actually only just read the email.) If I've missed you, I'm sorry, and I'll try harder. But I see every comment, and appreciate them all. Thank you so, so much!

Emma awoke to silence, and instantly panicked. Quickly, she jumped out of bed, and raced downstairs. She practically jumped out of her skin when she saw Mary Margaret sitting at the breakfast bar, eating lunch, and reading a book.

"Are you okay?" she asked.

"Where's Henry?" Surely if he was in any danger, her best friend wouldn't be so relaxed.

"He's out front with Killian," she said. "Henry was getting a little loud, and he wanted to make sure you didn't have trouble sleeping."

"He stayed?" Why would he stay after Mary Margaret returned.

Her friend smiled, one of those obnoxious, 'you like him, don't you?' smiles. "He said he told you he'd take care of Henry while you slept, and he didn't want to go back on that. Let me guess, he's the reason you got home late?"

"We went out for coffee," Emma said.

"I thought you said you weren't interested?"

"It wasn't a date."

"He likes you." She frowned when Emma made a face. "I know where you're coming from, Emma, but that doesn't give you the right to lead him on if you aren't interested."

"I'm not leading him on," Emma argued, "he wants to be friends, and he knows I'm not looking for anything else, and I don't see the harm in having coffee with a friend." She sighed when Mary Margaret raised an eyebrow. "We are not talking about this," she huffed. Knowing her friend would continue anyway, she turned, and left the apartment.

"Mama!" Henry ran towards her when she stepped out into the little garden area at the front of the small complex.

"Hey!" She laughed when he grabbed her hand, and dragged her over to where Killian was sitting in the grass. Her son was babbling something about a bug, but she couldn't quite understand. She sat down facing Killian as Henry continued to babble, and smiled. "You stayed."

"I said I would," he shrugged. It got quiet for a moment, until Henry shouted _Bug!_ Killian started laughing, then reached over, and gently removed a ladybug from a flower. "Careful, lad," he warned, as he let the ladybug crawl on Henry's arm.

"Be nice," Henry said between giggles.

"That's right, be nice," Killian nodded. He looked back up at Emma, "He loves ladybugs."

"I didn't know that," she whispered. All the hurt started flooding back to her, and she could feel herself on the brink of tears.

"I didn't either," Killian said, his voice calm and soothing. "It's a fairly recent discovery. Within the last ten minutes. Emma…"

But she was already a sobbing mess. She could barely hear him as he tried to reason with her, but Henry's worried little 'mamas' rang out loud and clear. There was shuffling, and she was vaguely aware of Killian taking Henry into the house, she didn't realize he'd returned until she felt him helping her off of the ground.

"I'm sorry," she managed, as he pulled her into a hug. It wasn't something she was used to. Her family was supportive, but kept a safe distance. She supposed she had herself to blame for that. She never really was the type who responded well to affections due to being shuffled from one heartless family to the next during her time in the system. It was never a good thing to show vulnerability when you had to fight for basic necessities.

She was lucky the Nolan's found her, but she'd never completely let her walls down. Even with family.

But Killian didn't know that, and he was here, and holding her while she cried. It was a strange feeling, completely breaking down in front of someone. Eventually, she calmed down enough to listen to him. He wasn't saying much, just quietly telling her everything was okay, and waiting for her to calm down. "Sorry," she said again.

"Nothing to be sorry for," he assured her. "Do you want to talk about it?"

Emma nodded, and Killian led her over to the small picnic table on the side of the building. "I was in prison," she blurted out as soon as they sat down. She cringed at her own abruptness, and glanced at him for a reaction.

He seemed shocked, though whether it was brought on by the blunt confession, or the fact that she'd been in prison, she wasn't sure. "I have a hard time believing you would do anything that would warrant prison, but...would you care to elaborate on that last statement?" He smiled at her when she started fidgeting, "Emma, whatever you tell me stays between us, and it's not going to change my opinion of you."

"Even if I told you I'm a serial killer?"

Killian laughed at that, and she felt the knot in her stomach loosen a bit. "Darling, I'm almost positive that you pack quite the punch, but you are _not_ serial killer material."

"I don't know if I should be flattered, or insulted," she teased. Then, she grew serious again. "I was set up," she said, describing everything that happened in as much detail as she could remember, "and...I know it was my own poor choices that put me in the situation I was in, but I didn't do anything. My ex just managed to get in over his head, and his buddies found the perfect fall guy in the process."

"You."

"Me," Emma nodded. "I guess things got messy really fast, and justice was swift when it came to convicting me, but working to prove my innocence was a little harder. It's a long story…"

"You don't have to tell it if you don't want to," he said, almost as if he could sense how drained she was from telling him as much as she had.

"I should have left before things got bad," she said weakly, "I was dumb to think I could save my marriage, and blind for not seeing the things that were happening right under my nose. It's my fault I don't know my own son...and it's my fault he prefers other people over me."

"If we're going to place blame," Killian suggested, "I'd blame the man who allowed you to take the fall for his crimes." She looked at him in disbelief. "I'm serious!"

"He was on the run by the time they came for me-"

"Doesn't matter. He abandoned you to save his own skin. Did they-"

"Find him?" Emma asked, "no. Honestly? I was lucky that I thought to start the divorce process right after he bailed, otherwise, I might still be dealing with it. I was arrested a couple months after he left, and if I had waited, I'd still be dealing with that mess."

"Sounds like you've had a rough go of it," he said. "Listen, love, you can take what I'm saying with a grain of salt, but you're being too hard on yourself. What happened to you wasn't fair, and it wasn't your fault. Both you and Henry were abandoned by someone who should have made you a priority, and for a brief moment in time, the system failed you."

"And you believe me, just like that?"

"I like to think of myself as an excellent judge of character," he smirked when she giggled, "and, you work for the sheriff's department. I can only assume they wouldn't hire a convicted felon."

"Touché."

"Henry loves you," he said, once she stopped giggling. "He's also two," he added, before she could try and argue, "and two year olds are the most fickle beings on the planet. They're going to crush your heart one moment, and the next, they'll be the most loving person in your life."

"You left out the hellion part," she added, her spirit picking up a bit. "When he's not being sweet or soul crushing, he's moonlighting as devil spawn."

"Ah yes," he chuckled, "all part of the job description. Like I said, he loves you. He may have a small group of favorite people, but you are the one he prefers over everyone."

* * *

 

Killian Jones quickly became a permanent fixture in Emma's life. She didn't intend for it to happen, and it seemed like it wasn't his intent either, but somehow, it happened.

Anna seemed to notice first, and teased Emma about stealing her best friend. Mary Margaret picked up on it when Emma and Henry started spending less time around the house.

It was different, having someone outside the family to confide in. Killian never seemed to press her for more than she was ready to give, but she knew he was willing to listen whenever she needed it. Having an unbiased listener helped. Especially since Killian didn't try to coddle her, or give her advice she didn't ask for. He told her everything as it was, and any opinions he had were non-judgemental, and helpful.

Not that she felt her family was judging her, but she got the vibe that they felt she shouldn't be so distraught, and that she needed to move on.

Killian was content to let her heal at her own pace, never once chastising her for backtracking.

So, yes. It was nice to have a friend outside of it all, who she enjoyed being around, and who seemed to enjoy being around her and Henry both.

Coffee was their thing. One outing turned into two, and soon, whether he was conducting storytime or not, they began meeting up after the program on Saturdays, and going for coffee. Some days, when she wasn't exhausted, the three of them would spend the day together, and other days, when she couldn't keep her eyes open, he'd help out with Henry.

She wasn't sure when Saturdays evolved into an almost daily ritual, but one Friday evening, he showed up at the station, coffee in hand.

"Apologies," he said, setting the drink on Emma's desk, "I wasn't sure if this was okay or not, but, I had a late shift, and thought since you were likely just starting yours, that some caffeine wouldn't be a bad idea."

"It's a great idea," she smiled, gesturing for him to pull up a chair, "thank you."

"My pleasure," he said, smiling back at her. "Is this okay?" he asked as he took a seat. "I wouldn't want you getting in trouble-"

"It's fine," she assured him. "I mean, it's Storybrooke, so it isn't like it actually gets busy around here."

One thing she noticed in the couple months that she'd known him, was that he always seemed to be able to read her. It wasn't until he sat down at her desk though, that she realized she could read him too. "Are you okay?" she asked. Something was off, though he seemed to be trying to hide it.

"It's been a rough day," he said, his gaze dropping to the desk, "I just didn't want to be alone."

"Business or personal?" Whatever it was, it was bothering him. Maybe he didn't want to talk about it. Maybe he just needed a little company to shake it.

Killian looked up again, and the pain was written all over his face. "I think we both know, that in our line of work, business can often be quite personal." Emma wanted to ask what happened, but he anticipated her question, and shook his head, "I'd rather not talk about it. I just wanted some friendly company."

"Well, you're welcome to hang out as long as you'd like," she offered, "and we can watch silly cat videos if you want."

That seemed to cheer him up, and he wound up staying for her entire shift. She found getting some of her more tedious jobs done much easier when there was someone to talk to, and he got to see firsthand how little crime actually seemed to happen in Storybrooke. He made her laugh, and helped her stay awake during the lull between calls. At one point, he opened up a bit about his day, and the particularly tough case that had him in a funk, and the weight on his shoulders seemed to lift.

By the time the sun rose, he was sleeping on the couch in the little office set up for the dispatchers. She couldn't help but smile (and maybe giggle a little) at the soft snores that filled the room.

She didn't want to wake him, he looked so comfortable, despite the cramped conditions, and as if he didn't have a care in the world.

"Late night, Nolan?"

The chuckle startled Killian awake. "Bloody hell," he mumbled.

"Little party last night?"

"Very funny, Locksley," Emma rolled her eyes, "but you did save me the trouble of waking him up myself, so thank you."

"My pleasure," Robin grinned, "so, is this miscreant bothering you? Would you like me to kick his arse to the curb?"

Emma laughed when Killian grumbled a curse at Robin under his breath. "I think I can handle him," she said.

"I've got it from here," Robin told her, "go get your boy."

When Killian followed Emma out, she half expected him to head towards the library. Instead, he made his way towards his car. "No library today?"

"Not this week."

"Maybe…" she shuffled her feet a bit, "...maybe you could join us?"

"Aye love," he said, "I'd be more than happy to join you both. Perhaps you'd like me to meet you there after I've cleaned up though?"

Emma nodded, "See you there."

It was the start of a new thing between them. From then on out, Killian would show up at the beginning of her shift, coffee in hand. He didn't always stay, but he made sure to keep her properly caffeinated.

And Emma made sure to stop by his place in the mornings, before he left for work, coffee and bagel in hand.


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Emma worries about Killian, who has suddenly become unreachable. Killian opens up about his past.
> 
> ***TRIGGER WARNING: Loss of a child. Past Tense.***

Killian groaned when the furious knocking on his door woke him from an alcohol induced slumber. His head was pounding, and he could hardly stand up straight, and yet, the knocking continued. “Bloody hell!” he snapped as he threw open the door, “go-” 

Emma stood there, Henry asleep in her arms, and she looked...well, he wasn’t sure what exactly was going on in her head, but she didn’t look happy. 

“Is everything all right, love?” he asked, his anger fading. Hangover or no hangover, Emma was here, she was upset, and dammit, he’d stood her up yesterday and this morning, and he was lucky she wasn’t angry with him.

“I was worried about you,” she said. “After you sent me that message yesterday, and then didn’t answer the phone this morning...I got worried. I didn’t mean to wake you up, or upset you, but I had to make sure you were okay.”

“Apologies, lass,” he said as he invited her in. She seemed wary, no doubt due to his outburst, but her concern won out, and she stepped inside. Killian quickly, rushed to dispose of the bottles that had accumulated during yesterday's binge drinking, even though she had already seen it all. Between the bottles, the evidence that he'd just spent the night in his living room, and his own, rumpled condition, anyone could see it had been a rough night. 

“It's just me, Killian,” she said softly. He tensed when he felt her hand touch his back, causing her to back away a bit. “Did I do something wrong?”

He hated that his actions led her to believe he was upset with her. With a heavy sigh, he tried his best to relax before he turned to her. “You've done nothing wrong,” he assured her, “I just…” he looked at the sleeping toddler on her shoulder, and gave her a little smile, “why don't we tuck him in, so you can give your arms a break?”

Emma nodded, and he relieved her of the little boy. Henry didn't even budge when Killian laid him on the little love seat, and covered him with the blanket that had been draped over the back of it. “He didn't sleep well last night,” she explained, “so he crashed on the way over.”

“I'm sorry I stood you up,” he said, leading her over to the sofa, “I'm sorry to have worried you, and I feel like an arse for having you and your boy share space with all these bottles.” He attempted again to clean up, but felt her hand slipping into his.

“Forget about the bottles,” she said, giving a little tug, “come sit down with me.”

He hesitated, but figured arguing wasn't his best option, so, he joined her on the sofa. Immediately, she pulled him into a hug, and that was all it took for him to break down. She didn't comment on his tears, and didn't push him to talk. She was just there, holding him, and doing what she could to comfort him. There were no promises that everything was going to be okay, just an assurance that she wasn't going anywhere. 

When he finally stopped crying, he sat back. “I'm sorry I stood you up,” he apologized again.

“You really didn't,” she reminded him, “you told me yesterday that you were going to be busy this weekend. I guess I just overreacted when I called and you didn't answer. I was planning on dropping some coffee off on the way home.”

“You know me all too well,” he chuckled. It wouldn't have been the first time he'd forgotten to take care of himself while working a particularly difficult case. Only, it wasn't a case this time, it was personal, but she didn't know that. 

He wanted her to know that.

After all, hadn't she let him in almost completely when it came to her own story? Not that he was trying to hide anything, it was just that his own story wasn't quite so new, the edges not so rough, save for a couple days out of the year, when he just wished to be left alone to wallow in his misery. 

Anna knew, but only because she was the one who had been there. They met the night his divorce had been finalized. He was drowning his sorrow in rum, and her arse of an ex was trying to cause trouble. There was no solution to his woes in the way his fist had connected with Hans’ face, but the bubbly little red-head had proclaimed him her hero, and immediately became his shadow. It took some time, but eventually he'd told her all about his reasons for being there that night. She helped him get back on his feet, and he introduced her to Kristoff. It was a fair enough trade.

It wasn't about trade now. With Emma, it was about fairness, and the fact that he felt safe in sharing his burden with her. Still, he needed to gather his thoughts. “I need to get cleaned up,” he said, not so much an excuse as the truth. Plus, his mind would be clearer after a hot shower and maybe some breakfast. “Perhaps we can talk afterwards?”

“Sure,” Emma nodded, “if you want to.” 

He told her that he did want to talk, and promised he wouldn’t be long. When he heard her ask if he was hungry, he answered with an “Aye!” before turning the water on.

When he came back out, he was carrying a small box he usually kept locked in his safe. He fiddled with it nervously as he made his way back to the living room. “Oh!” Emma gasped when he almost ran right into her by the kitchen, “sorry. I didn’t want to intrude, but you said you were hungry, and I thought maybe I’d make you breakfast…” 

The smell of coffee brewing hit him first. He took a quick glance around and noticed that she’d cleaned up a bit, and had started some bacon and eggs. His heart warmed, but he also felt guilty. “You didn’t have to clean up after me-”

“Oh, don’t worry about it,” she shrugged it off, “I’ve had those nights too...I mean, not since Henry, but I just...I get it, you know?”

“Thank you,” he said. He set the box on the coffee table in the living room, checked on Henry, who was still snoozing away, then returned to the kitchen just in time for breakfast. 

Emma looked exhausted, and the coffee didn't seem to be doing anything to help. Another pang of guilt hit him when he realized she probably hadn't slept since she got off of work yesterday. “If you'd like to sleep-”

“Maybe later,” she said.

They finished their meal in silence, and Killian made sure to put a little extra away for Henry, should the lad decide to wake up.

“You said you wanted to talk?” she asked, once they'd settled back on the sofa. Her voice was soft, and just as comforting as the hug she'd pulled him into earlier. “If you've changed your mind, you don't have to…”

“I just don't know where to start,” he admitted. It wasn't just the fact that it was painful, it was a piece of his life that he'd tucked away and protected at all costs. But Emma deserved to know, he reminded himself. He picked up the box and fiddled with the little latch as he contemplated what he was going to say. “I was married once,” he said slowly. “It didn't end well, but not for the reasons you'd think.” 

It still haunted him, the fact that he couldn't save his marriage. He tried, but in the end, the pain was too much for the both of them. All the guilt and blame bottled up until everything shattered beneath them. 

“We were going to have a baby,” he continued, handing the box over to Emma. She didn't open it at first, almost as if she knew where this was all going. “A girl,” he smiled a little, recalling that particular announcement. “She'd have been six...yesterday. That box is all I've got-” He choked on his words when she opened the box. Her own eyes were watering as she looked through the contents. 

He hadn't opened the box since he'd filled it, the memories, though now years old, still feeling fresh in his mind. But he watched anyway, as Emma began to look through everything. 

On top, was the ultrasound picture, proclaiming “I’M A GIRL!” Underneath, was a carefully folded receiving blanket tied off with a pink bow. She looked up at him, silently asking for permission to continue. “It's okay,” he whispered, unable to say much more. 

Emma untied the bow, and unwrapped the blanket to find a tiny homemade beanie and matching booties. A little hospital shirt was underneath that, and Killian wondered if it all still smelled like the hospital. A kindly old woman had delivered the homemade items to all the babies born that day, and despite their circumstances, she insisted they have something special for their little girl. 

Beneath the clothes, there were envelopes. “I um…” he reached over, and took the one labeled ‘pictures’, “these...they're more personal…” Like the items in the box, he hadn’t looked at the pictures since he’d placed them in the envelope. Even though he wanted to share his past with Emma, he wasn’t quite ready to revisit the pictures. A nurse had taken them, as both he and Milah said goodbye to the little girl who never had a chance to open her eyes.

“Okay,” Emma nodded as she pulled out the other envelope. There was a hospital bracelet, a card for the hospital bassinet with the words ‘Baby Jones’ scrawled on it, and another, smaller card, that had two tiny footprints inked onto it.

“Her name was Hannah,” he said, his voice still wavering, but slowly finding its way back. Emma looked at him, her eyes filled with tears. “My wife, Milah, she...she was sick for most of the pregnancy.” He frowned as he recalled the day he almost lost them both. “It only got worse, but the doctor assured us the baby was fine, the baby was growing...she was healthy. Then...all hell broke loose, and Milah almost died, and along the way, Hannah just didn’t make it.” 

“Things never did go back to normal,” he continued, “not that I expected them to. We were both mourning, each of us with our own guilt-”

“Killian, you  _ know  _ this wasn’t your fault.” She set the box back on the coffee table, and wrapped her arms around him. “It wasn’t anyone’s fault.”

“I know that now,” he said, “and I suppose I knew it then too, but we were both so distraught. I didn’t know who to blame, so I just blamed myself. If I had paid more attention, or questioned the doctor more...I know it isn’t rational, but it’s normal. But we never were able to fix things. We lashed out instead of seeking comfort in one another... and by the time I realized what we were doing, it was too late.”

“I met Anna the day my divorce was final. I didn’t want to go running to my brother, he had his own problems back then, and the last thing he needed was to deal with his failure of a brother.” Just as Emma started telling him he wasn’t a failure, he stopped her, “I am just as responsible as my wife for the end of my marriage. I also dropped out of school shortly after my daughter passed.”

“No one can blame you for that.”

“No,” he agreed, “and thankfully, my brother had been dealing with my tuition at the time, otherwise, I’d have been drowning in student loans.”

“Big brothers are more understanding than banks.”

“Aye. Thankfully, Anna is also the forgiving type,” he chuckled, “I do believe I told her to ‘sod off’ a couple times that evening.”

“Yeah,” Emma laughed, “she’s pretty persistent.” 

“She helped me with everything,” he said. “If it wasn’t for her, I’d still be wallowing in misery. But I went back to school, got my life back on track, and eventually, things started looking okay again.”

“Mama?” Henry’s worried little voice was followed by a wail. 

Emma let go of Killian, and rushed over to her son, who was now in a full on tantrum. “Hey, baby,” she soothed as she picked him up, and began rocking him. 

Killian watched as she comforted the little boy, and couldn’t help but smile. Just a couple months ago, she had called herself a terrible parent, and was afraid that she’d never be able to bond with her son again, and now… “I see you’ve become quite the baby whisperer,” he commented.

She sat down next to him, and Henry, tantrum long forgotten, began to perk up a bit. “I think he just woke up, saw he was in a strange place, and freaked out a little.” Henry let out a little giggle when Emma tickled him, “Are you hungry, big guy?”

“Yeah!” Henry exclaimed. 

Killian laughed at Henry's enthusiasm. Emma set Henry down, and started towards the kitchen, insisting she could reheat food without a problem when Killian offered to help. While she rustled around in the kitchen, Killian put his box back together. “I'll be right back,” he told Henry, “you stay here, and wait for your mum.”

Henry didn't seem to care that he'd been instructed to stay, and as Killian made his way back to his room, he heard little footsteps following close behind him. “You listen well,” Killian teased. He set the box on his bed, then lifted the very giggly little boy into his arms. “Come on, young man. Let's not worry your mother, hmmm?”

“I yuv you Ian,” Henry said as he wrapped his little arms around Killian's neck. 

Killian hugged him tight. “I love you too, lad.”

  
  
  



	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Emma and Killian get closer, and then things take an unexpected turn.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for your patience! As always, thank you to my awesome beta ilovemesomekillianjones

 

"Sorry I'm late," Killian whispered as he sat next to Emma on the library floor. "Last minute babysitting duties."

"No worries," she told him. He smiled when she handed him a coffee cup. "Don't tell Anna, but I smuggled some contraband." He looked up, and saw Anna give him a quick dirty look, before turning her attention back to the kids.

Roland took a seat between Henry and Jack, who were already enthralled with the story the librarian was telling.

Killian tried not to think too much about the fact that Emma was leaning against him. Things had shifted since she'd found him wallowing in misery a week ago. There was a new closeness, but it was still filled with caution.

He didn't want to scare her off, so he just let her take the lead. She seemed to be testing the waters, slowly crossing little lines that she'd drawn between them. It always stung when she backed off, but Killian did his best to hide his disappointment. He knew pushing her was unwise. No matter how far they'd come, how much the walls between them had fallen, she just wasn't ready.

Killian had toyed with the idea that she wasn't interested in more than friendship. On several occasions, he tried to tell himself that she was the kind of person who was comfortable sharing a closeness with those she cared about. Each time, he was proven wrong. Emma _wasn't_ the type to be overly affectionate with anyone, except for Henry. Even Anna commented on how different Emma was when she was around him.

Anna started to wrap up storytime, and Killian tucked his thoughts away for the moment. After the kids had finished up their arts and crafts, he could see that Emma was practically dead on her feet. "Regina is going to pick up Roland in a few hours over at my place," he said, "perhaps you could come over, and I can help you out with Henry so you can get some rest?"

There was a protest, he could tell. There was always a protest when she thought he was taking on too much, but it died quickly, and she just nodded. She even let him wrap an arm around her as he walked her and the boys out to his car. She was asleep before he even pulled out of the parking lot.

Once they arrived at his house, she woke just long enough to collapse on the couch. Even when the boys got rowdy, and he thought she might wake up, she didn't budge.

She didn't wake until some time after Regina picked up Roland, (not without comment about Killian's couch surfer) and Henry had already eaten, and crashed out in Killian's recliner. "Rough night?" he asked.

Emma nodded groggily as she sat up. The second he was on the couch, she was leaning against him, head on his shoulder, trying to stifle a yawn.

"Go back to sleep," he chuckled. "You know, I _do_ have a bed that's a bit more comfortable than this couch."

"Are you trying to get into my pants, Jones?" she asked.

"Wouldn't dream of it, darling," he assured her. "But if you're offering-" He laughed out loud when she swatted at him. "My bed is big, comfy, and you and Henry both look like you need a decent rest, which, you likely won't get on these couches."

There was hesitation, though only because she was complaining about having to stand up. He picked up Henry as she shuffled down the hall to his bedroom. Once Henry was tucked in, and looking cozy, Emma laid down. Just as Killian was about to bid them sweet dreams, Emma patted the space next to her. "Come take a nap with us," she said sleepily.

How was he supposed to argue with that?

* * *

"Are you going to sleep all day?"

Killian opened up one eye, and groaned, as if waking up were truly painful. "Where's Henry?" he asked. He'd been certain that the boy would be the one to torture him awake.

Emma giggled, "He's being just as lazy as you, but he'll probably wake up soon."

"Normally, I wouldn't complain," he said, squirming a little when she poked him in the side. "Waking up next to a beautiful woman is never a bad thing." He tried to get revenge, but only wound up getting tickled some more. "But when she's being a pain in the arse, it makes it a little more difficult to appreciate."

He wasn't sure what had gotten into her. The increase in cuddles and hugs, and now, the silly, playful side of her was starting to emerge. He had to admit, he rather liked it. Emma seemed much happier now than she had when he'd first met her. But it was still a fairly confusing change.

"Do you surrender?"

"Darling, I'm not even putting up a fight," he argued, "you attacked me for no reason at all."

"So, you surrender," she stated.

"Not quite." He smirked, then flipped her over. She squeaked, and then giggled when he pinned her down. "I should get my revenge right now," he teased. "I'm certain you're fairly ticklish."

"Mercy!" she cried.

"Oh, now we want mercy?"

"Please?"

He kissed her forehead, then let her go. "How about I order us some pizza?" he suggested. He wasn't sure what time it was, but if the way his stomach was growling was any indication, it was time to eat something.

Emma looked over at Henry, who was, surprisingly, still snoozing away. "I guess that sounds good. I'm sure if he doesn't wake up soon, the smell of the pizza will get him going. He's going to be up all night, you know."

"Aye," Killian nodded, "he is. But, it's the weekend. A little schedule upset isn't going to do any harm." He grabbed his wallet from the nightstand, and quickly went back to the subject of food. He was _starving._ "Pepperoni?" She tried to offer to pitch in, but he wasn't hearing it. After insisting everything was fine, he left the room.

Just as he finished ordering, he turned to see Emma walking into the room. She didn't seem upset, but there was obviously something weighing on her mind.

"Emma?"

"I...um...thank you…" She moved closer, but stopped short. "You know, for watching Henry, and um...dinner…"

"Are you all right, love?" he asked.

"I was just thinking," she said.

"About?"

She seemed stuck, both in place, and with her words. Killian walked over, and wrapped his arms around her. "You know you can tell me anything, right?" He felt her nod against his chest, but she remained silent. "What were you thinking about?"

If there was one thing he knew about Emma, it was that when she started to worry about something, the walls went up. He didn't want to push her, knowing that she would only retreat faster, but her silence was becoming unnerving. After what felt like an eternity, she looked up at him. She smiled, lifted up on her toes, and gave him a quick kiss on the lips. There was a little nervous giggle as she pulled away, and Killian couldn't help but notice that she was blushing. "I…" she stammered, "that's...um...that's what I was thinking about."

So many things had changed between them since the day they'd first met, but this shy, awkward version of Emma wasn't something he ever thought she was capable of. Emma, despite her fears, always seemed to be so certain of what she wanted, and damn anyone who stood in her way. Now, she was acting as if she hadn't a clue how to pursue what she wanted.

Not that she really had to do anything but say the word when it came to him.

"I just," she sighed, the color on her cheeks darkening even more, "I know you _were_ interested at one point, but we've kinda become pretty good friends, so I wasn't sure...you know?"

"Still interested," he assured her. She visibly relaxed, and he took the opportunity to kiss her again.

There was no hesitation this time. Emma gripped his shirt tightly in one hand, the fingers of her other, tangled in his hair. It was anything but gentle, and Killian couldn't help but get carried away. She let out a little hum of approval when he pressed her up against the wall. The hand that was clutching his shirt let go, and began to wander.

Killian groaned when she grabbed his ass, earning a giggle from the woman who was currently torturing him.

Torturing him in all the best ways.

God, he loved the way she felt against him. Loved the way she tasted. A mix of coffee and something he couldn't quite place. He let his own hand find its way to her rear. She let out a little gasp when he gave it a squeeze, and rolled her hips into his.

He'd have her right here if she'd let him, and if Henry weren't in the next room.

_Bloody hell. Henry._

Killian stopped immediately, feeling like he'd been doused with cold water. Emma didn't seem too thrilled with the sudden cool down, and tried to pull him close again.

"Why'd you stop?" she asked.

Guilt washed over him. What the hell was he doing? Emma was worth more than a quick heated exchange against the wall. He could see in her eyes though, that she was beginning to retreat, likely out of fear of rejection.

"Henry," Killian answered.

"You knew I had a kid," she frowned, and crossed her arms.

"Not what I meant, love." he sighed. How was he supposed to explain his reservations, when he'd just proven he had no self control? "I just mean...he's right there in the other room, and I'm not sure having him catch us in such a state is a good idea."

"Oh." Her arms uncrossed, and he was grateful to see that she understood. "So...now what?"

They needed to talk, but likely wouldn't have time. Henry was bound to wake up soon, and then there would be pizza, and then, he'd take her home. "I'd prefer to court you properly," he said, hoping that would be enough for now.

"Can we keep everyone else out of it?" she asked. "At least for the time being. I'm not trying to make you some dirty little secret, it's just...our friends meddle."

"I'd much rather we figure this out on our terms, rather than theirs," he agreed.

"It'll be hard," she said, a little smile on her face. "If you want to court me properly," she giggled at the statement, "I'll need a babysitter. I'm sure you've learned that Mary Margaret can't keep a secret?"

"We'll figure it out," he laughed.

* * *

They figured it out by way of stolen kisses, and long weekends. Granted, the secrecy meant he wasn't able to take her out on a proper date, but he didn't care.

She was happy, and that was all that mattered.

It was also possible everyone had figured it out, due to the fact that she was spending more time than usual with him. But no one said anything, and that was just fine with him.

"I think we should say something," Emma said one morning. Over the past couple weeks, she'd taken to just staying over. It was nice, waking up with her in his arms. They hadn't crossed that last line though. Another thing that didn't really bother him. He didn't want to rush a good thing, and was actually surprised when Emma seemed ready to spill the beans. "It's been a month," she explained, "and everyone probably knows anyway. So, we should just come clean, and then I can ask Mary Margaret to babysit so you can take me out on that proper date you're always talking about."

He liked that idea very much. "Why don't we tell them next weekend?" he suggested. "We'll all be there for game night, and it's best to just drop the bomb with everyone present."

"You're so good with words," she teased.

Only that proper date never came. It was dead in the water by the end of game night. Killian wasn't sure what happened. One minute, everything was fine, and the next, Emma didn't want to go home with him.

That wasn't even the worst of it. The worst part was when she'd texted him: _I don't think this is going to work._

He tried to call her, to get her to talk to him, text him back, anything. He wasn't sure what he'd done wrong, but she had ignored every attempt to get in touch with her. Part of him wanted to march right back over to the Nolan's apartment, and demand she tell him what happened.

But he knew all too well what happened when Emma felt pressured.

The hardest part wasn't the loss of what he'd hoped was a blossoming relationship, but the probable loss of one of his best friends. He couldn't stand the idea of a life without Emma, even a life where they were only friends.

What had he done that would cause her to want to shut him out so quickly?

He fired off one last text, and when he was met with silence, he tossed the phone across the room, and buried himself in pillows and blankets. Exhaustion claimed him, after the tears had long since dried up.


	7. Chapter 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Summary: Emma's reasons for backing away come to light, and a first date ends in some adorable cuddles.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: Hey guys! I'm sorry I managed to break everyone with that last chapter! But, I promised it would be okay, and I hope after you read this chapter, you'll forgive me!
> 
> As always, thank you to the lovely @ilovemesomekillianjones for going over this for me. I can't thank you enough for dealing with my generally behind schedule, often angsty self!

Emma was miserable.

She knew cutting Killian off completely was going to be hard on her, but she never expected the hell she brought upon herself. Killian was rightfully upset, and it killed her to ignore his desperate messages, just begging her to talk to him, but it was for his own good.

He deserved better, and so much more than she could ever offer him.

Still, she wandered through life in a daze. When she was done with work, she'd go straight home, and tend to Henry. The first couple days, she found herself going towards his house out of habit. Part of her wanted to just give in, and beg for forgiveness, but her rational side reminded her that he deserved someone who could give him everything. So, she cried, turned around, and went home.

After almost a week of no Killian, Henry began to notice the difference. Emma almost broke the first time someone came to the door. Henry got excited, and went to grab one of his books, proclaiming "Ian!" as he ran back to greet their guest, only to find it was just David, whose hands were too full of groceries to open the door himself. It took a whole hour to calm her son down after that.

The first Saturday, she knew Killian would probably show up to StoryTime, and she couldn't risk seeing him. When Henry began to throw a tantrum, Mary Margaret chastised her, and took the boy to the library. When she returned with a sleeping Henry, Emma knew she was in for a lecture.

"He wasn't there," Mary Margaret said as she placed the boy in his toddler bed. Emma, half buried under her blankets, remained silent, which, judging by her friend's reaction, was the wrong thing to do. "I told you not to play with his feelings," she said.

"I didn't mean to," Emma said weakly.

"What is it then?" Mary Margaret asked. "Because, for a split second, everything was fine. You were both happy-"

Emma was grateful for the knock on the door. Mary Margaret let her know, in no uncertain terms, that the conversation was far from over. As she went downstairs to greet her guest, Henry woke up, and crawled onto Emma's bed. "I yuv you momma," he said, cuddling up to her as best he could.

"I love you too, baby," she said softly. She tried to ignore the hushed voices below, knowing that whoever Mary Margaret was talking to, she was trying to keep it quiet. But when her friend came marching back up the stairs, Emma knew who was at the door.

"You owe him an explanation at least," Mary Margaret stated.

"I can't," Emma whispered. If she walked down there now, she'd cave.

"Fine," Mary Margaret snapped, "at least let him see Henry."

Emma couldn't refuse that request. If Henry was missing Killian, she knew Killian was missing Henry. So, she nodded, and Mary Margaret picked up Henry, and took him downstairs. She couldn't help but sob when she heard Henry exclaim "Ian!" excitedly, and it hurt even more when she heard Killian tell Henry that he'd missed him.

What the hell was she doing to them?

She heard Mary Margaret telling the boys she was going to give them some time. Once the door was closed, Emma knew she couldn't continue to hide. Maybe her friend was right. Killian deserved an explanation, and maybe, he would feel forgiving enough to let things go back to the way they were before.

When she finally mustered up the courage to walk downstairs, Killian was sitting on the couch, Henry seated in his lap, and they were reading a book. They both looked up when Emma entered the room, and a guilty look covered Killian's face. "Emma…" he glanced between her and Henry a couple times. "Mary Margaret said it was okay-"

"It's fine," she said.

"You're more than welcome to join us," he offered.

Why was he being so nice? She could tell by the look on his face that her presence unnerved him. He should hate her for everything she'd put him through. Why didn't he?

She sat next to him, and did her best to keep the horrible lump in her throat at bay. Though, by the time the book was finished, her tears were flowing freely, and she was powerless to stop them. "I'm sorry," she whispered.

Killian smiled at Henry, and asked if he wanted to watch cartoons. When her son agreed, she turned the television on, and Killian set him down.

She expected anger, or at the very least, coldness, but Killian gave her neither. Instead, he wrapped his arms around her, and hugged her tightly. "I'm sorry, I'm sorry," she cried as he tried to calm her down.

"It's okay," he said softly. "I'm not angry."

"Why not?" she asked.

"I'm hurt," he admitted, "and confused. But not angry, Emma. I just...I wish you'd tell me what I did wrong."

"Nothing," she sobbed, "you're perfect."

He chuckled, "Oh, I highly doubt that, sweetheart." She let out something akin to a half sob/half giggle, and cringed, knowing that she'd probably just ruined his shirt with a mess of snot and tears. "We've always talked, love," he continued, seemingly ignoring the fact that she was absolutely disgusting at the moment. "Just tell me what's wrong. If it wasn't me, then what happened?"

He deserved to know the truth. Maybe if he knew, he wouldn't be so hurt. "I talked to Anna-"

"Bloody hell, Emma," he sighed, "you and I both know she's over excitable. Let me guess, she already planned a wedding?"

Emma laughed, because it was true. Anna had gotten so excited, that she had started planning everything out. They'd been in the kitchen, getting more snacks, when the the redhead started bubbling over with joy. "It's not that," she said. It really wasn't. She could take the enthusiastic friends, and even talk about the future, but what she couldn't take was the realization that she could never give Killian what he wanted. "She reminded me that you wanted a family."

Anna had jumped from wedding planning to baby names in a split second, and that's when Emma had lost it.

"I don't understand."

She sat back, and did what she could to wipe the mess from her face. "I can't give you that," she said weakly.

"Forgive me," he said, "but isn't it just a little too soon for family planning?"

"But that's just it," she argued, "with me, there _is_ no family planning."

"Why don't you explain a bit further?" he suggested, "because I'm still unsure of where you're going with this. What do you mean by can't? Physically can't, or can't see yourself ever having more children?" When she hesitated, he smiled at her. "Neither one is a deal breaker. I just want a clear picture."

"Physically," she mumbled. "I had a pretty complicated pregnancy, and a lot of damage afterwards…so...even if I _wanted_ to...I can't."

"Emma-" He pulled her back into his arms.

"I didn't have much of a choice, because it was pretty bad. In a way, it killed me, knowing I'd never have another baby, but at the time, I figured it was for the best," she said. "I knew I shouldn't have any more kids with Neal anyway." It made sense, and was a foolproof assurance that she wouldn't get pregnant again.

Things were different now, though. Back then, she naively assumed she'd be married to Neal forever. She never thought she'd get divorced and meet someone new.

Someone she'd _want_ to have children with.

"I'm sorry," his voice was soft and sympathetic.

"I should have told you," she said, "before I even agreed to anything. You have every right to know what you're getting into. Then, I talked to Anna, and I realized I could never give you the family you want-"

"Are you serious?" She pulled out of his hold, and gave him a curious look. After telling him all that, was he really going to insist it wasn't a deal breaker? "You've already given me far more than I'll ever deserve," he told her. "You're enough. More than enough. You want to talk about family? You brought Henry into my life."

"Technically, I think Mary Margaret did that," she teased.

"Aye," he agreed, "but you let me continue to be a part of his life...of your life. Emma, that's more than enough for me. I would be perfectly happy for the rest of my life if it were just the three of us. And if we decided later on that we wanted to expand our family, well...there are plenty of options out there."

"Really?"

"Really," he nodded. "Look, if you don't want to be with me, that is your god given right-"

"I _do_ want to be with you," she interrupted. "I'm sorry I hurt you. I'm sorry I freaked out and made a mess of everything. I guess maybe I shouldn't listen to Anna so much, huh?"

"Can we start over?" he asked. "Not, _completely_ over, but...perhaps I can take you on that date?"

Emma nodded, amazed that he was so quick to not only forgive her, but that he was willing to give her a second chance. "I can't promise I won't freak out," she admitted, "but...I can promise that I won't run away again."

"I meant it when I said you can tell me anything," he said, "even if you're telling me you want space. I can listen, and I can give you that."

"I don't want space right now," she said.

* * *

Emma didn't want space ever again.

Things settled into a new normal after their talk. In a way, things went back to the way they were, but they were also different. They still spent time together, but now, the affections were less guarded. The secret was out, she and Killian were happy, and Emma was determined to keep her promise. Whenever there was a problem, she would talk, instead of run.

Which proved to be difficult when Killian brought up the subject of their first date.

It only made sense that dates would go hand in hand with dating, and it wasn't that Emma didn't _want_ to go on an actual date with her boyfriend, quite the opposite, actually. There were days where she could think of nothing but all the cliches. Dinner and a movie, long romantic walks on the beach, good night kisses, and maybe one day, they'd tangle up the sheets, and sleep until noon together.

But she had Henry to think about, and he knew that. She appreciated the fact that he didn't push, and that he didn't seem at all irritated when she worried about her dilemma.

It shouldn't have even been a dilemma, but it was. Prison had kept her from her son for six months. Currently, she was just starting to feel comfortable as a mother again. Leaving Henry with a babysitter so she could go on a date? Not really something she ever thought she'd have to think about.

"He'll be okay, you know," Mary Margaret said. "I watch him while you work all the time. I don't see why a couple hours every now and then, so you can spend some adult time with your boyfriend, is a bad thing."

"That's just it," Emma complained. She felt like she was whining. "I leave him for work, because I have to. If I want to support my son, I have to work, and it's a necessary evil. Leaving him so I can go have a good time-"

"Is something a lot of single parents do," Mary Margaret assured her. "I know you're scared, and that it feels wrong, but Emma, you're a good mother. It's not like you're ditching him every chance you get so you can party all the time. It's a date." When Emma didn't seem convinced, her friend rolled her eyes. "We both know that Killian absolutely loves spending time with the two of you. But how are you going to figure out the 'Emma and Killian' part of the equation if you don't spend some time together alone?"

"I hate that you have a good point," Emma wrinkled her nose, and gave Mary Margaret an embarrassed little smile.

"Just make sure that if things escalate, that you use protection, and...give me a call if you're going to spend the night."

Emma rolled her eyes, and promised she'd be home at a decent hour. She wasn't quite ready to leave Henry so she could go have overnights just yet.

But a date? Yeah. That she could do.

Killian was ridiculously sweet about it, at one point, even offering to retrieve Henry when she kept mentioning him. She wasn't trying to sound nervous, really, and she consciously tried to keep from worrying about her son, but she couldn't help it.

"I'm sorry," she groaned, after another mention of Henry. "I worry too much, don't I?"

"He's your son," Killian said as he reached across the table for her hand. "You're going to worry. The question is, is there anything I can do to ease your mind?"

"Maybe some wine?"

Wine seemed to do the trick. Not so much that she could be hauled off to detox, but just enough to get a pleasant buzz going. She found it was helpful in keeping her worries at bay, and allowed her to open up just a little bit more to the man who'd somehow wormed his way into her heart.

As the night wore on, she wondered if she shouldn't just call Mary Margaret and say she'd be coming home in the morning. Killian was being the perfect gentleman, but she knew if she said the word, he wouldn't hesitate to end the night at his place. But that small, still slightly rational part of her brain reminded her that she didn't need to rush things. So, after dinner, and a nice walk on the beach, (because she just had to have some cliche in there) he drove her home.

There was a kiss goodnight, followed by both of them entering the loft. They were stopped by what seemed to be a joyous Mary Margaret, and a rather annoyed David. Her brother crossed his arms like the overprotective father he thought he was, and her sister-in-law just beamed at them.

"Why do I feel like a teenager who's been caught sneaking in after curfew?" she grumbled as she led Killian upstairs. She laughed when she noticed Henry was very much awake, and climbing onto her bed. "Hey big guy," she said, once he was settled right in the middle. There would be no sleep for her tonight.

"Hi momma," Henry said, a big grin on his face. "Hi Ian."

"You do know that mommy's gonna be sleeping there tonight, right? You need to get back to your own bed." She and Killian sat down, and gave the giggly little boy hugs.

"Nope!" he exclaimed.

"You want mum to sleep in the race car bed, don't you?" Killian asked. He laughed when Emma shot him a dirty look.

"Yup!" Henry agreed.

"You say goodnight to Killian," Emma said, "and we'll discuss this further when I get back." There would be no discussion, she knew it. By the time she returned, Henry would be sound asleep again.

"Night Ian," Henry launched himself at Killian, and Emma felt a tug at her heartstrings as the two said their goodnights.

"You be good for your mother lad," she heard him whisper. When Henry didn't giggle maniacally, she counted it as a win.

After they had Henry all snuggled up under the covers, Emma walked him back downstairs, and to the door. Her overbearing brother and sister-in-law didn't seem to understand the word "privacy" and sat on the couch as they waited for Emma to say goodbye.

"I really need to get my own place," she whispered. Killian laughed, but David cleared his throat, and she knew he wasn't just going to disappear while she kissed her boyfriend goodnight.

_Boyfriend._ She liked the sound of that.

"Goodnight, Emma," Killian smiled, leaning down to give her one last kiss for the night. She could almost swear she heard Mary Margaret making some unintelligible squeaking sound.

"Goodnight."

After she closed the door, she turned to look at her family. "You guys suck."


	8. Chapter 8

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> As always, thank you to my lovely beta @ilovemesomekillianjones I really don’t know what I’d do without you! 
> 
> Summary: Emma and Killian’s relationship is flourishing, but will a blast from the past put the brakes on it? 

 

Killian spent a lot of time with Emma and Henry, but Saturdays were his favorite. Emma would come over after StoryTime, and sleep while he cared for Henry. When she woke, the three of them would spend the afternoon together, and sometimes, the two of them would stay the whole weekend. Those were the days he liked best. Emma was far from ready to move in, and if he were being completely honest, as much as he wanted it, he wasn't ready either.

But it was still a step in the right direction. He couldn't help but smile when he saw her toothbrush sitting in the holder next to his, or when he'd trip over a toy Henry had forgotten. They were all little reminders that he was a part of something special. Something he never wanted to let go of.

This particular Saturday, both Emma and Henry were in need of a nap. "Let me see the lad," Killian said. Emma transferred the sleepy toddler into his arms, and Killian gave her a quick kiss on the cheek. "You go lie down, I'll get him to bed." She nodded, and headed towards his room, while Killian brought Henry to the spare. Over the past few weeks, it had become less of a spare room, and more Henry's toddler-cave. The bedsheets now had race cars and rockets, and his antique table lamp had been replaced with something more Captain America. Toys were scattered around the once immaculate floor, and the little wardrobe now held weekend clothes for Henry, just as Killian had made space for Emma's clothes in his own closet.

When they did move in, it wouldn't be much of a transition.

A knock at the door pulled him from his thoughts. He finished tucking Henry in, and went to answer.

"Can I help you?" he asked the man standing outside. He'd never seen him before,

"I'm looking for Emma."

Killian's heart stopped. There were very few people who knew to look for Emma at his place, and they were those they knew and trusted. This man was a stranger to him. How did he know Emma, and how did he know to come find her here? "She's sleeping," he said. It wasn't a lie, and it could buy him time to try and figure out who this man was.

"Yeah, well wake her up," the man said. His approach was already sending up red flags, and now, with the sudden change in demeanor, Killian was even more on edge. "I'm her husband," he added.

"One moment." Killian shut the door, and scrubbed his hand over his face. Of course it was Neal. He knew right off the bat that he was the last person Emma wanted to see. With a heavy sigh, he went into the bedroom. They'd only been home a few minutes, but Emma was already fast asleep. He hated waking her up, but she deserved to make the final call.

"Emma," he said gently, giving her a little nudge.

She rolled over and smiled at him. "Hey, you," she said, her voice lazy, and thick with sleep. "Coming to join me?"

"Not at the moment, sweetheart," he said, "I...your ex is at the door." There was no easy way to put it, but she had to know. Emma frowned, and sat up. "I didn't feel it was right to just tell him to go away. If you want me to, I will, but you deserve to make that choice."

"I'll talk to him," she said as she climbed out of bed. "Come with me?"

"Of course," he agreed.

"I know what you're going to say," she sighed, "that it's my problem, and I need to handle it-"

"Nonsense," he interrupted, "while it's true it's your business, and I'll respect that, if you need me, I'm here."

"Thank you."

Emma smiled, and gave him a quick kiss on the cheek, then made her way towards the door. He stood behind her as she opened it, and she reached back for his hand. It was a small comfort, but when he laced his fingers with hers, it gave her the bit of courage she needed to deal with Neal. Who probably didn't know he was now an ex-husband.

"So that's how it is?" Neal asked before she could even say a word. "I'm gone for a little bit, and you pack everything up, and go running home?" He gave Killian a quick glance, "Looks like you've been busy too."

"What do you want, Neal?" she asked, anger seeping into her tone.

"I want to see my son."

"No." She was already shaking. If he noticed, he didn't mention it. "You abandoned us. You've been gone for almost a year, and now you want to come back just like that? I went to prison because of you!"

"That wasn't supposed to happen," he said, "but I couldn't come back-"

"Now you want to see Henry?" she cut him off. "You lost all your rights to him when you abandoned him."

"He was a baby. It's not like he knew one way or another."

Emma felt Killian tense up. Neal was getting to both of them, and she needed to end the conversation before things got worse. "You have no right to see him," she said, "the divorce was final a couple months ago, and custody has been awarded to me. You're more than welcome to try and fight that in court, but I think we both know you're still a fugitive. Tell me how that works out for you."

"Emma, please let me explain-"

"Get out of here," she growled, "and don't come back. Don't follow me around town…" she stopped and gave him a dirty look when he attempted to interrupt. "Uh-uh, I'm talking. I know you followed me, because how else would you know I was here? Leave me alone, and leave my family and friends alone. I'm giving you one chance. Get lost. If I even catch a glimpse of you again, I'll be sure to send the police your way."

"Emma-"

"You heard the lady, mate," Killian snapped, "now get off my property."

Neal made a face, but didn't argue further. After he left, Emma closed the door, and turned to Killian. "Are you okay?"

"Shouldn't I be the one asking you that?" he teased.

She wrapped her arms around him, smiling when he did the same, and squeezed her tight. "You just seemed upset," she said softly.

"I deal with parents like that every day, love," he said, "it never gets any easier. You deserve better. Henry deserves better."

"We have the best." She looked up at him and smiled, "I love you."

He was shocked. Not by her feelings, but by the fact that she was the one to say it first. "I love you too," he almost whispered. It was overwhelming, knowing how much trust she placed in him, especially when she'd been let down by the man she'd trusted before. "Come on," he said, "let's get a bit of rest, aye?"

"Aye," she giggled.

* * *

 Almost a month had passed since Neal found his way to Killian's doorstep. He hadn't shown his face since, but Emma couldn't shake the feeling that he was still hanging around. She brought the incident up to David and Robin, just for piece of mind, but it still ate at her.

Despite the drama with Neal, things between her and Killian were coming together nicely. Slowly, but surely, she and Henry were moving in. Leaving a little more with each visit. They'd even talked about getting married.

Sometimes, Emma wondered if they were moving too fast. That was usually when Mary Margaret reminded her about how slow she'd taken her prior relationship.

And look how well that turned out.

With Killian, it wasn't always easy, but it felt natural. How could she be moving too fast if things were just right?

"Earth to Emma," Anna giggled.

"Oh, sorry." Emma pulled her head out of the clouds, and came back to the dinner table. She had gone out with Anna, Elsa, and the kids for a quick dinner. "What did you say?"

"I wanted to know if you were going to answer your phone," Anna said.

"It's been chiming for a couple minutes," Elsa laughed.

Emma looked at her phone and smiled. "It's Killian," she said, reading the text messages. After looking at a couple of them, she frowned. "He...something's wrong." It wasn't that he'd explicitly mentioned a problem, but his messages seemed off enough to worry her. She looked back up at Elsa and Anna, "Do you think you could keep an eye on Henry?"

"Of course," Elsa nodded, "just keep us updated."

"Thanks." Emma left money for her food, and rushed out of the diner.

On her way to Killian's, she hoped that everything was fine. That she'd just read too far into the message asking if she'd come over. Maybe it was just a slip, maybe she wasn't clear when she'd told him she wanted to spend the weekend with him.

Or maybe something was terribly wrong.

When she arrived at his place, the door was ajar. She knew she should call David, but she couldn't bring herself to wait for help to arrive. If Killian was in danger, every second counted.

She pushed the door open a little more, slowly, so as not to make any noise, and peeked inside. There was utter darkness when she entered. An eerie silence chilled her to the bone.

"Killian?" she called out. It wasn't the brightest move, she knew that alerting people to her presence could put her in a bad spot, but she needed to know. Needed to know if he was here, and still okay.

No one answered, so she risked turning on a light. The living room and kitchen were in slight disarray, indicating either a burglary, or a scuffle. "Killian?" she called again. She tried to stifle the panic rising up as she moved through the house, finding each room empty, and untouched, save for the spare room Killian had converted into a space for Henry.

It wasn't a mess, like the front of the house had been, and things weren't exactly out of place, but it was obvious that someone had been in here. The wardrobe had an open drawer that had been emptied, and she noticed a few toys missing from the shelves.

Three phone calls to Killian went straight to voicemail, and the text she sent telling him to call her went unread.

A faint ringing caught her attention, and she ran towards the front of the house. She found the source on the kitchen table. It was a no-frills, generic looking flip phone.

Emma knew it wasn't anything good, and once again, thought she should probably call David, but deciding time was of the essence, she picked up the phone. "Hello?"

" _Finally,_ " the voice on the other end said.

"Neal?" Her heart dropped, and her stomach knotted up.

"You know, you are a _really_ difficult person to get through to," he said. "So, I went another route."

"I swear to god, if you've hurt him-"

"He's fine," Neal interrupted, "for now. I think you know how this works, Emma."

She wanted to tell him that she didn't, but she'd seen enough movies to get the general idea. "Let me talk to him," she said. Her voice was shaky, and she hated sounding so weak when Killian needed her to be strong, but she couldn't help it.

Neal had his faults, but never did she think he would come completely unhinged. A few seconds of silence passed, and Emma wondered if her demand had only made things worse.

"Emma?" Killian's voice sounded groggy, and somewhat panicked, but she still let out a sigh of relief when she heard it.

"Killian, are you okay?" she asked.

"I'm fine, love," he said, though she could tell he was _not_ fine.

She did her best to assure him that she had everything under control. "Don't worry, Killian. I'm going to get you out of there, okay? I love you."

"I love-"

Suddenly, his voice was gone, and Neal was back. "That's enough of that. Here's the deal. No cops. You bring Henry, alone, and we make the exchange."

"Exchange?" Was he really asking her to do what she _thought_ he was asking her to do?

"My son, for your pathetic boyfriend," Neal said. "You've got two hours. You come alone, or you can say goodbye to loverboy. I'll text you all the details. Don't try anything stupid, Emma. Two hours. If you're not here, he's a dead man."

"Don't do it, Emma!" she heard Killian shout before the line went dead.


	9. Chapter 9

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Summary: Emma decides to save Killian, even though she's sure neither one of them are going to make it out alive.
> 
> A/N: Thank you so much for your patience. As promised, there is a little angst, but it didn't last long. Thank you as always to ilovemesomekillianjones for running through with the beta eyes! :-D

 

When Neal sent her the address, Emma panicked. She recognized it from the days she used to cut class, or sneak away. It was where she and Neal always met up. An abandoned, and long forgotten section of the shipyard.

She already knew that she wasn't going to make it out of this alive. That didn't matter though. What mattered was getting Killian out of there, and keeping Henry safe.

After letting him know she had to pick up Henry before she could meet his demands, she headed to Anna's house. The one thing she knew she could do, was protect Henry.

Calling anyone would be a stupid move, and driving to David's would be an even worse one. There was no telling who or what Neal was keeping tabs on. When she arrived at Anna's, Elsa was already getting Henry ready to go.

Emma sighed, and tried to think fast. Both Elsa and Anna gave her the same curious look when she bolted into the kitchen, and grabbed a pad of paper that was sticking to the fridge. She held a finger to her lips, silently begging them not to say anything. Anna caught on, and grabbed a pen.

"How was he?" Emma asked as she scrawled the address on the paper. She continued to write as Anna gushed about how adorable Henry was, and what a good boy he'd been.

_Shipyard._

_Killian in trouble._

_Wait five minutes, and call David._

When she finished, Elsa took the paper and nodded.

"Let's get Henry ready," Anna said. She held up a backpack and some blankets. She didn't have to do anything but grin, and Emma knew. Anna was planning to make a decoy.

"Thank you," Emma whispered as the girls quickly helped her pack up a bundle that might look like a small child from a distance.

* * *

Killian knew he was going to die. As much as the thought terrified him, he would rather die protecting his family, than have Emma make such a trade. Emma would put Henry first. He knew that. He _expected_ that. There wasn't any part of him that wanted her to choose him over her son.

He was certain that Neal knew that too.

"So," Killian broke the silence that had settled after Neal ended the call with Emma, "how do you plan on doing me in?"

"Shut up," Neal snapped.

Killian smirked. Neal couldn't do anything until his two hours were up. He needed the leverage in case Emma showed. Death may have been right around the corner, but it wouldn't stop Killian from having a little fun at his captor's expense.

"If you're planning on shooting me, you've no imagination," he teased. "Perhaps you have a sword? Not original, but not something you see every day either."

"I said shut up," Neal growled.

"Maybe you're not actually man enough to finish the job," Killian suggested. "What would people say? You'd be a laughingstock."

"You're pretty ballsy for a guy who managed to get himself drugged, kidnapped, and restrained without much of a fight."

Killian thought about it a moment, then shrugged as best he could with his arms tied behind him. "I suppose I would have fought if you hadn't poisoned my lunch. I can't be faulted for that. It's not like you slipped me anything right in front of my face. Bad form, by the way. Drugging your opponent in order to take him down. Only a coward refuses to fight fair." He smiled when Neal stormed off. "You'll have to kill me, you know!" he called after him. "Emma would never turn her son over to you!"

"That is enough out of you!" Neal said as he came back into the room.

"What are you-"

The last thing Killian remembered was a sickening crack. When he opened his eyes, there was a dull throbbing at the back of his head and something covering his mouth. He looked up to see Neal sitting in a chair across from him… smirking.

"Feeling okay there, buddy?" he taunted. "I knew you'd fight me about the duct tape, so I had to make sure you were out.

Killian glared at him, but it only seemed to amuse Neal. They sat in silence until the sound of a car pulling up caught their attention. Neal looked pleased. Killian's heart sank.

_Bloody hell, Emma. What are you doing?_

Emma parked the car, then took a deep breath. Silently, she tried to reassure herself. It wasn't working.

She stepped out and approached Neal and Killian. "Where's my son?" Neal asked.

"He's in the car," Emma said calmly. Neal looked over her shoulder and seemed satisfied with the little bundle in the back seat. "Why don't you untie Killian, and I'll give you the keys?"

It was a longshot and she knew it. But Neal took the bait. She winced when he ripped the tape off of Killian's mouth. "I'll be taking the bug too," Neal informed her as he cut Killian loose.

"Emma, I told you not to do this," Killian said softly. There was disappointment in his tone. It hurt even though she knew it was all a ruse. She shook her head and wouldn't look him in the eye, hoping that would sell the act even more.

Neal didn't seem to care about their exchange at all. He approached Emma, grabbed the keys she offered, and started towards the car. As soon as he was a safe distance away, she ran to Killian. "We need to run," she hissed.

"But Henry-"

"He's fine. Go!"

Killian resisted, insisting they stay and fight for Henry. Emma groaned when she heard the door to the bug open, then slam shut. "What the hell is this?"

"RUN!" she shouted again. When a gunshot fired into the air, Killian finally took the hint. They took off at a sprint, and ducked out of the back of the building. "David should be here soon," she promised.

"What about Henry?" Killian asked.

"He's safe," she assured him, "he was never in the car."

"Not so fast!"

Killian and Emma skidded to a halt, just barely missing a collision with Neal.

"This used to be our spot," he told Emma as he waved the gun he was holding. "Did you really think I wouldn't remember all the secrets?" He trained the gun on her, laughing when Killian shoved her behind him.

"Oh come on, buddy," Neal rolled his eyes, "that's only gonna get you killed first."

"Neal… please." Emma wasn't above begging. "It's me you're angry with. Let him go. If you're going to kill anyone-"

"He hasn't got the balls to kill anyone," Killian interrupted. He hissed when Emma punched him. "I mean it!" he continued, "you should have seen how relieved he was when you showed up. Did you see how quickly he turned me loose? Any kidnapper worth his salt wouldn't have done that. He was eager to get rid of me, because he's afraid to pull the trigger."

 _Dammit Killian!_ Emma thought as he continued to taunt Neal. She let out a sigh of relief when she noticed a police cruiser pull up nearby.

Neal spun around when he heard the doors open. David and Robin stepped out, and for a moment, she thought there was going to be a shootout. Killian seemed to have read the situation a little better though. Neal dropped his gun, and took off like a rocket, pushing through them to get away.

"I've got him!" Robin shouted. He got back into the cruiser and sped away.

David rushed over to Emma and grabbed her shoulders. "Are you okay?" he asked. When she nodded, he gave her a scolding. "What were you thinking? Why did you run off on your own? Why didn't you call me?" He wrapped her in a bone crushing hug without letting her even begin to explain.

What was there to explain though? David knew damn well why she did it. "Killian…" she whispered.

David let her go, and she immediately ran to Killian. "Did he hurt you?"

"No, love, I'm fine," he assured her. "The duct tape was the worst of it. The drugs just allowed me to take a nice nap."

"Robin is taking Neal to the station," David interrupted after his radio squawked. "He'll be back for us in a few minutes."

* * *

It was a long night of questioning and drug tests. Killian was sure whatever Neal had used was already out of his system, but he didn't have it in him to argue. Emma was by his side, holding his hand and playing with his hair while David hovered over both of them.

There were so many questions. Killian felt as if his head was spinning. He didn't have answers for most of them, and the answers Emma had made his blood boil.

He was angry. Not just at Neal for what he did, and what he tried to force Emma to do, but at Emma. How could she risk her own life like that? She had a son who needed her and yet, she still walked straight into a situation where she was certain she wouldn't come out alive.

He remained silent despite it all. There was a part of him that knew he should be grateful that Emma cared that much, and another part of him that felt guilty for being angry at her. Wasn't she just trying to protect him?

"I'm sorry," Emma whispered. Killian snapped out of his thoughts and glanced around the room. It was empty. When had everyone left? "I couldn't just call David and hope for the best," Emma continued. "If Neal had seen someone other than me-"

"He threw the gun, love," Killian argued, "he wasn't going to hurt anyone." He sighed, "but it wasn't as if you knew he'd do that…"

"I had to try," she said softly.

Whether he liked it or not, Emma cared enough about him to put her own life on the line. How could he be angry with her when he only would have done the same? "I know," he said, "thank you."

"Let's go home."

Killian couldn't agree more. The knot on his head had the doctor worrying enough to try and keep him overnight, but he was having none of it. "Please, Emma?" He gave her what he hoped was his best pitiful look

She giggled, and the doctor groaned. Somehow though, it worked, and before he knew it, they were on their way home.

* * *

Emma made sure her boys were nice and comfortable before she started dinner. They were reclining in Killian's easy chair. Henry was asleep on Killian's shoulder, and Killian didn't look like he was too far behind in the sleep department.

"I could always order pizza," Killian suggested. "Or, I could get off my sorry arse and make my own dinner."

"I want you to take it easy," Emma said, "but, I wouldn't turn down a pizza."

"Order up, love," he teased. He gestured for her to come over, and when she did, he pulled her onto his lap on the opposite side of Henry. "You should move in," he said when she laid her head on his shoulder. "All the way," he added, "you and Henry bring everything over and come stay with me."

"Okay," she agreed.

"We should get married too," he said. "Because I want to marry you. Sooner rather than later, but I can wait if you need time."

Emma's heart skipped a beat. They'd talked about it before, but this felt more like a proposal to her. Not the casual conversations they had about the future or anything like that. He sounded so certain about it all. "I don't want to wait," she said.

"Bloody hell," he grumbled. "I've botched the whole damn thing. Let me propose properly… when I haven't got the ring hidden away in my sock drawer."

She looked up at him and smiled, "all right, I'll save my 'yes' for then."

His grin was a mile wide when he leaned in to give her a quick kiss. "I won't screw it up so much next time," he promised.


	10. Chapter 10

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Summary: Emma and Killian look towards the future and their plans to expand their family.
> 
> A/N: Well folks, here it is. The final chapter! Thank you so much for joining me on this ride! A super big thank you to ilovemesomekillianjones for doing the beta work on this tale. I really appreciate it! :-D

 

_Two years later..._

Emma was not having a good morning. She was supposed to meet Killian at the library _ten minutes ago._ An unexpected phone call, followed by Henry throwing a fit over his socks not fitting right had her running behind.

When she rushed into the library, almost twenty minutes late, she already had an apology ready to go. But her husband wasn't anywhere to be found.

"Okay, kid," she whispered, "go play with your friends while I go find daddy."

Henry was all too willing to comply. He ran to join Jack, who was sitting next to Anna as she read to the children.

"You made it."

Emma turned around and lost it. One look at Killian, and she couldn't put on a brave face anymore. She sobbed as he pulled her into his arms. "Emma," he soothed, "sweetheart, tell me what's wrong."

She wanted to just whine and cry about how in addition to their son's tantrum of the century that morning, she'd gotten a call from the adoption agency, giving her some not so great news about their placement on the waitlist.

"It's been a rough morning," she mumbled, fully content on leaving it at that for the time being.

He knew. He _always_ knew when she was holding back. But he didn't question it, just held her as she sobbed.

"I'm sorry," a timid voice interrupted, "but… she's asking for you."

"Who?" Emma asked, confused as she looked over to see Aurora, one of the newest residents in town. She was holding a wiggly little girl in her arms, who was reaching for Killian.

"I believe she means me," KIllian laughed. He let go of Emma, and took the girl, who seemed completely content now that she had what she wanted. "I was helping Aurora out earlier. She had her hands full with this one."

Confused, Emma glanced between the baby and her newest friend. "I thought you had a boy? Phillip?"

"Fosters," Aurora informed her.

"Oh…" It was another thing she and Killian had talked about. They'd even gone through the process, and were completely ready should the need arise, but Emma couldn't bear the thought of only being a temporary home in some cases.

"Could I leave her with you for a few minutes?" Aurora asked, "I just need to make sure Phillip isn't causing any trouble."

"Of course," Killian assured her. After Aurora scurried off, he smiled at Emma. "Perhaps you'd feel better if we joined Henry?"

She nodded, and they joined the group, taking a seat near Henry and Jack. The children continued to play around, their attention spans waning as Anna neared the end of the story.

As the kids began shuffling around for arts and crafts, Emma's attention turned to the little girl in Killian's arms. She didn't have much of a vocabulary from what Emma could tell, and she looked so tiny. Maybe two years old at the most, with bright red hair and a smattering of freckles across her nose. She had big, brown eyes that lit up whenever Killian said or did something she found particularly amusing.

She was adorable, and Emma's heart ached as she watched the two of them playing together. It was a glimpse of what they wanted, what they'd worked so hard for. Something that constantly seemed to be slipping through their fingers. "The adoption agency pretty much told me we'll be waiting a little while longer," she whispered. It had been the same story for the better part of a year now. Always just a little while longer.

"I'm sorry, love," he said, sounding just as devastated as she felt.

Adopting Henry had been easy. Neal, despite the fuss he'd caused before, was surprisingly on board. "The boy needs a dad who can be there," he'd said, "and it's pretty obvious I've been a crappy one… and I won't be seeing the light of day for a long time."

Needing a distraction, she thought about the girl again. "How long has Aurora had her?"

"Just under a week…" Killian sighed. "Father took off months ago, and the mother passed away. It wasn't my case, but I helped find a temporary home."

She remembered he had been upset about something earlier that week, but he insisted that he didn't want to talk about it. Sometimes, she wondered how he could do such a job. Killian would adopt every kid that walked into his office if he could.

"Is anyone coming to claim her?" Emma asked. Surely there was a grandparent, or an aunt or uncle somewhere.

"Unfortunately not," Killian said. "Aurora and her husband have opened their home until my coworker can find something more permanent, but I know it's already hard on them, especially since they've got a wee one of their own."

"We could be more permanent," Emma suggested. "I mean… look at her. She really likes you." As if to drive the point home, the baby laid her head on Killian's shoulder.

"Emma," he sighed, "we can't-"

"Why not?" she demanded, a little louder than necessary. A few patrons looked over in her direction. She whispered an apology, then turned back to Killian. "Why not?" she asked again, a little quieter this time. "Look, I know it isn't as easy as picking out a kid, and taking them home, but-"

"I won't be the one to tear what's left of her family apart," he said.

Emma shook her head. She didn't understand. He said she had no family left, why would he-

"She has a little brother," he informed her. "Bitty little guy…" His voice choked up, and he shook his head, not wanting to continue.

Emma laid her head on his free shoulder, and gave his hand a squeeze. She knew it was hard on him, growing up in the system. Being separated from his brother, even for a short period of time had hurt him. His experience was the whole reason he chose the field of work that he did. As painful as it could be sometimes, Killian wanted nothing more than to be a champion for as many children as possible. "So let's not break them up," she suggested. "I mean, we have plenty of room, and lots of love."

"We both know it's not that easy," he reminded her.

"Okay," she agreed, "but you said Aurora and Philip are having a hard time. We can foster too. Henry's a little older, so two smaller children aren't going to be a problem. So, we foster them while we're working on making it completely permanent."

"There's more," he said. "The mother had an extremely complicated pregnancy, and died during childbirth. With all the issues, the premature labor, and family history of disorders…" he looked to the little girl in his arms, "she seems to be fine as far as family history goes, but he might have his own set of complications."

"So we should just forget about it because he _might_ have problems?" She couldn't believe the words that were coming out of her husband's mouth.

"No," he said, "I didn't mean it like that, love. I just think you should know everything before you make any sort of decision. Either way, our lives our going to change drastically. I just want to know that you're truly ready for anything that might come our way."

"Can I meet him?" Emma asked. She'd already fallen in love with the little girl, and was halfway there with the baby without even seeing him.

"I can't make any promises," Killian said.

"I understand," she said. She looked up at him and couldn't help but return the smile he was giving her. He wanted this just as much as she did, and she knew he would do everything in his power to make it happen.

* * *

 

_Six Months Later…_

Baby squeals filled the room, indicating that Emma was not shoveling food into Oliver's mouth fast enough. "You'd think we starve you or something," she teased, giving a soft pinch to his pudgy little arm. He was no longer the bitty little infant they'd brought home. His once bald head was now covered with dark blonde curls, and his brown eyes were just as big and as happy as his older sister's.

"Emma?" Killian came into the dining room with a little girl tucked under his arm like a football. She was giggling hysterically, and kicking her feet. "She's done it again." He set her at the table, and Emma could see exactly what he was talking about.

"Umm…" she looked at the little girl, whose belly was peeking out under her shirt, and smiled, "Annie, your shirt is too small! You need to stop growing!"

"Nope!" Annie declared.

"Let's try this one," Killian said, grabbing a shirt from the basket of clothes that still needed folding. "Reach for the sky!"

Annie did as she was told, laughing as Killian struggled to get the shirt off of her. He handed her the new one when she insisted she wanted to dress herself. "It fit!" she proclaimed once she had it on.

"French toast is still warm," Emma said, nodding over to the plate on the counter.

"Thank you, love," Killian gave her a quick kiss, then went to fix up a couple plates.

"Where's Henry?" Emma asked. While he was starting to appreciate the beauty of sleeping in, he was almost never late for breakfast.

"He'll be out shortly," Killian promised with a chuckle. He set the plate in front of Annie, and another in front of Emma. "I know you haven't eaten yet," he said, "and I'm sorry for oversleeping. Get some food, I'll deal with Mister StayPuft."

Emma moved aside and wished him luck.

"Mine's yittle!" Annie complained as she compared the plates. Killian had cut her toast into little bites.

"I'll just make mine little too," Emma tried, hoping it would appease the sometimes temperamental toddler.

"I'm ready!" Henry announced as he joined everyone. He was dragging an overloaded backpack behind him. Emma jumped up, and made a plate for her son, who dropped the bag by the table, and scrambled up into a chair. "When do we go, mamma?" he asked when she served him his breakfast.

"Not until a little later, baby," Emma said. Henry had just learned that he would be going into Kindergarten in September, and all summer long, he could do nothing but talk about it. Her heart broke when he gave her a little pout. She looked down at his backpack, which was just about bursting at the seams. "Tell you what," she gave him a little smile that she hoped would cheer him up, "why don't you and I go school shopping today?"

"Just us?" he asked.

Adjusting to two new people in the house had been hard on all of them. Henry most of all. Most of the time, he was fine, he loved Killian, Annie, and Oliver. But Emma could tell that sometimes, he missed when it was just the two of them. She looked up at Killian, who gave her a little nod. Looking back at Henry, she nodded. "Just us."

It was only eight in the morning, and Emma was already exhausted, but her heart was full. It was a big change in all of their lives. Suddenly, there were three kids instead of one. There were special diets, extra laundry, and diapers. Oh god, she'd forgotten all about diapers until they brought Annie and Oliver home that first night.

There were tears, mostly from the kids as they adjusted, but it wasn't an extremely lengthy process. Henry enjoyed having the two around, and even with the occasional jealous streak, he was okay, and adorably protective of the two children he already referred to as his brother and sister.

Emma and Killian both worried about Henry's attachment in the beginning. As fosters, and with the children's biological father still out there, there was a very real chance they might not get to keep the kids. But as time wore on, it was apparent the man wasn't coming back, and his silence made it clear that he didn't want to be found. It was heartbreaking, but Emma couldn't help but feel relief the day they started the adoption process.

They were still waiting for everything to finish up, but Annie and Oliver had been theirs in their hearts since the day they'd met them.

Papers were just legalities.


End file.
